Page 10 of Beautiful Lies
How could one person create such a strong reaction in me? Why couldn’t I ever be free of him?
I still remembered the boy who was all elbows and knees, his dark hair falling into his eyes. He wasn’t that boy anymore. At twenty-four, his broad shoulders and six-pack abs threatened to burst the seams of his white T-shirt. His dark hair was cropped short, his face chiseled and harder-looking than it used to be.
But he was still the most beautiful boy I’d ever laid eyes on. And he still made my heart ache.
In the past eleven months, I’d only seen him once. I knew his schedule, knew where he’d be at any given time of the day, and I went out of my way to avoid him.
Sitting in Trinity Bar on a Saturday afternoon was not part of his daily routine.
“What are you doing here?” I hated how cold my voice sounded. I hated how the heat and the light in his eyes faded. Most of all, I hated that I still cared about his feelings when he obviously didn’t give a damn about mine.
His gaze swung to Zeke, dismissing me. “Do you have a few minutes?”
“Sure,” Zeke said, pulling up a stool next to Connor like this was perfectly normal, even though they’d never been friends.
I breezed past them, dying to know what Connor could possibly want from Zeke, but I forced myself to keep walking, my boots tapping across the hardwood floor. As I passed the open doors leading to the courtyard, I glanced outside. It was almost October but felt more like a summer’s day. Hipsters crowded the picnic tables, talking and laughing over the music, the air scented with roasted pork from Jimmy’s Taco Truck, and the lavender and mint I planted.
When I reached the safety of the office, I sank into the black leather swivel chair and took a few deep breaths, trying to pull myself together. Plenty to keep me busy here. Working at Trinity Bar was the perfect job for me. I made my own hours, excelled at social media, which I used to promote the bar, and loved the organizational aspect of the job. I wore many hats—doing the paperwork, accounting, booking the entertainment, running promotions, tending to my little garden in the courtyard—so I never suffered from boredom. If I wanted to socialize, I could. If I wanted to hole up in the office, that was cool, too. Yep, my life was hunky dory.
A little while later, I was reminding all my virtual friends to come out and see tonight’s indie rock band when Zeke entered the office.
“Hey,” I said, trying to sound casual. I spun my chair around to face him. “So, what was that about? Was it personal? I mean … about us?”
Zeke shook his head and pulled me out of the swivel chair and into his arms. He kissed me, and I kissed him back. He was a good kisser, but his kisses didn’t turn me into a bowl of Jell-O. I still had my wits about me, and I considered that one of the perks of this arrangement. Zeke released me, and I looked over at the doorway, feeling his presence even though he hadn’t made a sound. For such a big guy—six feet, three inches of solid muscle—Connor moved like a ninja, a skill he’d perfected to survive his childhood.
Connor’s eyes narrowed, his jaw working to contain his emotions, but I saw what he tried to hide. Jealousy. Hurt. Sadness. Anger. They flashed across his face before he locked it down and clenched his jaw, the muscle in his cheek jumping as we stared each other down.
You screwed up, asshole. It didn’t have to be like this, I told him with my eyes.
Zeke took my spot in the chair I’d vacated and laced his fingers behind his head, cool as you like. I shot him a look. He shrugged nonchalantly like it couldn’t be helped. Zeke had kissed me on purpose, knowing that Connor would see it. “I’ll stop by on Monday before the shop opens. Does noon work for you?” Zeke asked Connor.
“Forget it,” Connor gritted out. “Bad fucking idea.”
Zeke flashed me a smile as Connor strode away.
“What was that?” I hissed, planting my hands on my hips. It wasn’t like Zeke to be cruel, but he had to know that throwing it in Connor’s face would hurt him.
Zeke grabbed my stress ball, a smiling Buddha face, that I kept on the shelf with my color-coded binders, propped his feet on the desk, and tossed the ball from hand to hand. “Ava, you’re gorgeous. You’re smart. You’re sexy. And you’re totally cool. But I’m not the guy for you because you’re still in love with someone else.”
“I’m not … Connor and I … whatever we had … it’s ancient history,” I spluttered. “We’re over.”
“Keep telling yourself that.” Zeke delivered the words with a smile, but I still felt the sting. He tilted his head. “Why are you with me?”
Zeke was changing up the game. This wasn’t what we did. We hung out, had fun, shared a good laugh, and had sex. We didn’t bare our souls or push each other for answers to tough questions. Our deal started out like this:How about we hook up exclusively?In other words, we’d only have sex with each other, and when one of us was ready to move on, we’d call it quits. No harm, no foul. Perfect plan.
“Because it’s easy,” I said, deciding to be honest. “You don’t come with a lot of baggage.” I leaned against the edge of the desk and crossed my arms. “Why are you with me?”
“You needed a diversion. I’m good for that. But I’m starting to think I want more. Something real, you know? Like Eden and Killian have. Like you and Connor had …have.”
I didn’t bother reminding him that Connor and I were over and that we had been for almost five years.Five yearsand I was still holding on to … what? The ghost of a memory.
“You’re looking for a real relationship?” I asked, surprised. Zeke had always been a player and maintained that he liked it that way.
He laughed. “Nah. I’m just messing with you. I’m not ready to settle for one person anytime soon. But this isn’t about me. It’s about you. I don’t pretend to know Connor … those Vincent brothers don’t make it easy.”
Zeke was right. Nothing had ever been easy with them, but their lives had never been easy either.
“But you know what I think?” I shook my head, curious to hear his thoughts. “When they fall in love, they fall hard, and it’s for life.”
