Page 91 of Beneath Your Beautiful
“Bye, Eden. Catch you later, Killian.”
Killian didn’t respond. I nudged his arm, but he guided me out the door without saying goodbye.
“Let’s stay at your place tonight,” he said.
“But Connor—”
“He’s a big boy. He doesn’t need a babysitter.”
I climbed into the Jeep and fastened my seatbelt. “You need to talk to him,” I said, boldly venturing into dangerous territory. “He’s your brother. He was trying to defend you and—”
“I don’tneedanyone to defend me.” Killian pulled away from the curb, his jaw clenched. I sighed loudly. Killian turned up the volume on the music to cut further conversation. I promptly turned it down. He glared at me. I ignored it.
“This is what you do,” I said. “You shut down and shut people out.”
“Did I shut you out?”
“You tried.” I sat in silence for a few seconds, trying to come up with the right words, but maybe there weren’t any. I just needed to share my opinion. “What happened to you growing up was horrible—”
“I thought we were done talking about that.”
“Just let me finish. It was horrible for you, but it must have been horrible for Connor too. He feels guilty about it. You never let him—”
“Fucking hell, Eden. I was trying to protect him. Am I supposed to feel bad about that?”
“No. That’s not what I’m saying. He loves you for protecting him, for always being there for him, but he wants to find a way to make it up to you.”
“You’ve known him…for what…a week?”
Eleven days, but whatever. “We talk on the nights you work.” Connor felt guilty about the drugs and all the times Killian had to clean up his mess, but now I knew it went deeper.
“You talk,” Killian said sarcastically. “Of course you do. He probably pours out all his thoughts and feelings. I bet you love that. Sorry to tell you, I’m not Connor. I don’t sit around analyzing every detail of my life and throwing myself a fucking pity party like he does.”
I took a deep breath to calm myself. “Connor doesn’t—”
“Fuck Connor. You said we were good. Why are we talking about him?”
“Because I don’t want you to shut him out. You need each other. He’s the only real family you have. I know you know that, so I don’t need to tell you…”
“But you’re telling me anyway.”
I shrugged. “Yeah.”
He parked down the street from the bar and cut the engine. “Anything else?”
“I think I covered it.”
Killian gripped his upper lip between his teeth. “I’ve been this way most of my life so don’t expect miracles overnight.”
“I won’t. But you’re getting better.”
He chuckled and shook his head. “You think?”
“I don’t think it. I know it.”
Killian turned in his seat to look at me. “How do you always know the right things to say to me? And all the things you do…just for me…. Eden, what do I do for you?”
“You don’t know what you do for me?”
