Page 84 of Beneath Your Beautiful
“I was working through some stuff and I needed space,” he said, not meeting my eye. He was lying about something, but I didn’t know what or why. “I needed time. But I swear on my life, everything will be different now. I’m going to do the work. I know my word’s not good anymore. But I’m going to prove it to you. One day at a time. I’m just asking you to have a little faith in me.”
Have a little faith. Yeah, I guess that was what I needed to do. No matter what he did, he was still my brother, and there was nothing in this world I wouldn’t do for him. He knew that.
“I need to talk to Jared,” he said. “See if he’ll take me back.”
“He will. Eden’s there now.”
“She’s a tattoo artist too?”
I met his gaze. “No.”
“Jared’s wall,” Connor said, working his jaw.
That’s what happens when you skip town.
It was supposed to be Connor’s wall to paint. Jared wanted to wait for Connor to come back. Despite all the drugs Connor had done over the years, he’d somehow managed to hold down his job. The way Jared talked about Connor, you’d think he was a prodigy. An artistic genius. Brilliant with a streak of madness. A free spirit, Jared called him. Junkie was the word he left out.
I talked Jared into letting Eden paint the wall. He wouldn’t have said yes if he didn’t think she was good, but Eden didn’t need to know that Jared promised the wall to Connor. Jared asked her to paint a skull, roses, and wings—Connor’s idea. But Connor never sketched anything in advance, so Eden could do her own version of it.
“She’s good,” Connor said.
“I know.”
“Killian,” Ava sing-songed. “I’ve been shop—”
“Ava Blue,” Connor said. He called her Blue for Bluebird. Connor loved birds. No mystery there.
“Connor,” she said, her voice hushed.
He wrapped her up in his arms, and she looked so tiny, and so fragile.
“I hate you,” she whispered.
“I know.”
They disappeared, and I placed an order with the beer distributor. Fixed a broken soap dispenser in the men’s room. Conducted an inventory in the liquor room. Jotted down a to-do list for Ava. I knew the drill. She’d be a wreck for the next few days, and her organized brain would be thrown into chaos. After today’s talk, she’d refuse to speak to Connor. Sometimes that went on for weeks or even months. They’d broken up over three years ago, right around the time Connor had gotten clean the first time, but I’d given up trying to figure out their screwed-up relationship.
Eden called to tell me she was done so I headed out. I didn’t know why I spent so much time working at the bar, taking on all the problems. Louis said I was a workaholic. Connor said I was addicted to pain. Eden said everyone had their own coping mechanisms. Keeping busy, taking care of problems I could fix, was what I did.
“Wait up,” Connor said, as I was on my way out the door. “I’ll come with you.”
We drove in silence. I watched him in my peripheral, trying to gauge his mood. I couldn’t think of a damn thing to say that wouldn’t come out sounding angry, so I kept my mouth shut. Up ahead, I saw Eden across the street from her wall, snapping photos. The way the sun hit her, she shimmered like gold, I swear to God. I eased off the accelerator as we approached. If I were an artist or a photographer, I’d want to capture her at this very moment.
“Jesus Christ,” Connor said. “That’s her?”
“That’s her.”
I pulled into a spot farther up the street, so I wouldn’t ruin her photos, and cut the engine. She lowered her camera and looked over at the Jeep, her lips widening into a smile. Her gaze swung to the passenger seat and her mouth formed an O.
“Does she know about me?” Connor asked.
I nodded. Eden didn’t know everything. But she knew about the drugs and rehab, and she knew how worried I’d been that he hadn’t contacted me.
“She’s beautiful,” Connor said.
“Yeah, she is.”
“Is that a smile?” he asked. “Holy shit. It’s a smile. Can I get a photo?”
