Page 51 of Beneath Your Beautiful
“If I wanted your advice, I would have asked for it.”
“But you took my advice,” Louis said smugly. “Or you wouldn’t be going out to dinner with her.”
“You’re taking credit for this?”
“If I hadn’t said anything, you never would have pulled your head out of your ass.”
That was a lie. I never did anything I didn’t want to do. If this wasn’t something I wanted, all his advice would have fallen on deaf ears. He knew that. But if he needed to take credit, let him. “Your job here is done,” I said. “Now get back to your real job.”
He held up his hands and backed out of the office. “Just wanted to give you a proper send-off. Be brave, warrior.” He pounded his chest with his fist before he finally left me alone.
Be brave, warrior. Jesus.
Ava stopped in the doorway, holding a taco in a cardboard container. “So…big date, huh?”
“It’s just dinner.”
“Uh huh. Sure, it is.” She looked me up and down as I cuffed my sleeves. “Is that what you’re wearing?”
I looked down at my black shirt and black jeans. Clearly, it was what I was wearing so no answer was required. Did the whole world know I was taking Eden to dinner? The only person I told was Louis, and I regretted it.
“You wear that all the time,” Ava said. “You wear too much black. You should jazz it up with a little bit of color every now and then.” I eyed the loud colors of her psychedelic mini skirt. It was like a strip of fabric on acid. Just looking at it made my head spin. “You would look really good in a light blue shirt.”
Everyone had an opinion. “I don’t own a light blue shirt.”
“Exactly. But you should. It would match your eyes. When Connor wears blue—” She stopped talking and we stared at each other for a few seconds before she lowered her head, but I saw the tears she was trying to hold back.
“I need to go,” I said, brushing past her. I didn’t need a reminder that Connor was still out there somewhere, but I had no fucking idea where. Every day I worried that I’d get that dreaded phone call from a hospital or a police officer, and every day I thanked God when it didn’t come.
“I’m sorry,” Ava said, her voice sounding small, but I still heard her. “You look great, Killian. Really. You always look great.”
I raised my hand in the air and forced myself to keep walking, right out of the bar and onto the street. I didn’t stop or slow down or turn my head to see what the bartenders were doing. Progress. Louis accused me of being a control freak and a workaholic, but he knew the real reason I needed to keep busy—less time to think. And I liked taking care of problems I could fix. In my real life, I had a shit-ton of problems with no solutions.
When I got outside, I breathed in through my nose and out through my mouth. Deep breaths. On the drive to Eden’s apartment, I tried to calm myself down. It was just dinner. I needed to chill the fuck out. I rolled out my shoulders. Even before a fight, I never used to get nervous. But this was uncharted territory, and I didn’t want to screw it up.
Last night, I’d gotten a taste of Eden, and I knew it would never be enough. I’d never understood the power of a kiss before. She didn’t taste like an ashtray or lipstick or dirty martinis. Eden tasted like warm honey. She smelled like…orange blossoms, I guess.
After she told me the story about her dickhead boyfriend, I didn’t want to be another dick who screwed her over. I wanted to be someone worthy. I wanted to be someone special to her, not just some guy who fucks her and leaves. That wasallI’d ever done in the past, something she got to hear about from Joss.
I should have known that nothing good ever happened at Fat Earl’s. Being in that bar again twisted my stomach into knots. Eden noticed something was wrong. She always noticed. But I pulled myself together and by the time we finished our game of pool, it was all good. Until we ran into Joss and Adam.
I told Adam if he valued his life, he wouldn’t get within a hundred yards of Eden. Wouldn’t even glance in her direction. He’d make sure Joss did the same. Adam knew who I was, and what I was capable of, and that worked in my favor for a change. He wouldn’t mess with her again.
I climbed the stairs to Eden’s front door and pressed the intercom. The lock on this door wasn’t worth jack shit. She should talk to her landlord about this. I backed up on the landing and looked at her windows. Closed. I smiled when I heard her voice on the intercom, “Killian?”
“Good evening, ma’am. I’m one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and I’d like to talk to you about the Lord’s work.”
She laughed that husky laugh of hers. “The Lord works in mysterious ways. I’d love to hear more about it. Be right down.”
“I’ll be waiting.” I tried to get my dick to behave. Just hearing her laugh got me hard. I groaned and rubbed my hands over my face.
The door opened behind me, and I turned around to look at her. She gripped her plump lower lip between her white teeth and smoothed her hands over her dress. It was white, or something close to white. The sleeves wrapped around her biceps, leaving her shoulders bare. I’d never make it through dinner. I wanted to skip food and haul her back upstairs and ravage her body. The dress was deceptive. It appeared to be sweet and innocent, but on her, it was the sexiest dress I’d ever seen. My gaze traveled down her tanned legs to sandals that tied around her ankle. I wanted to rip open the laces with my teeth.
I lifted my eyes to her face. She was wearing her hair down, a blonde tumble of loose waves. She told me she keeps her hair long for her mom who said she never thought she was vain until she lost all her hair. I hope Eden never cuts her hair. I love that she doesn’t wear tons of makeup so I can actually see her face. Her lips are naturally pink and lush and…fuck. I hadn’t said a word since she stepped out of her door. “You look good.”Beautiful.
She smiled. “Thank you. I changed my outfit about twenty times. But I ended up wearing my first choice.”
How cool that she admitted it. No pretense. No ulterior motive. Just pure honesty. “Good choice.”
