Page 47 of My Sweetest Agony
“Now?”
He nods.
“Where?
With his gaze locked on mine, he inclines his head vaguely east. “To the shore.”
“The shore?” An image of the beautiful sandy beach Drew and I spent so much time on flashes through my mind. The bright sun. Warm skin. Drew’s arms around me. Drew down on one knee… “But it’s closed. It’s the middle of the night.”
Cam nods deliberately. “Which is why I came now.”
“I don’t understand.”
He takes another drag off his cigarette and then drops the butt and grinds the toe of his boot into it, resting his arms on his knees. “There’s only one place in this world he’d want to spend eternity.”
Oh.
“You want to go spread his ashes in the water.”
He nods cautiously. “I think it’s the perfect place, but I’m pretty sure it’s also illegal. Hence…” He motions to the dark around us. “A night mission.”
I watch for any signs of humor that would suggest he’s joking. “You’re serious.”
But Cam just nods again.
“Wow, you really don’t give a shit, do you?”
A single black brow rises. “About what?”
“The law?”
He smirks. “I thought that would have been obvious by now.”
I release an agitated sigh and run my hands through my hair, squeezing my eyes closed as I consider his suggestion.
Silence hangs over us, broken by a few crickets singing in the grass and the gentle swaying of the branches and rustling of the leaves on the trees that line the street.
“The longer you let him sit there, the harder it’s going to be to finally let go.”
I open my eyes and look over at him.
See the tension in his body.
The unshed tears shimmering in his eyes.
“Ivy, I’m not saying it’s time to move on, because that’s impossible. But those ashes sitting up there in that box are not Drew.” Cam places a hand over his chest. “He’s here.” He reaches over and presses it against mine, the warmth of his touch seeping through my shirt and warming me from the inside out. “He’s here.”
And he’s right.
About that box.
I haven’t even been able to open it.
Without Cam pushing me, I might sit there forever and stare at it, thinking about what’s inside, clinging to Drew in a way he never wanted.
Even if I don’t do it for me, at the very least, I can do it for him.
“Let’s go, Ivy.” Cam keeps his hand flattened to my chest, as if he’s afraid pulling it away will somehow make me say no. “Let’s go put him to rest.”
