Page 93 of Conquered
A part of me notices that none of them deny the inference that things may go further than just bodily harm. My stomach threatens to revolt at that thought.
I can see his arms are crossed over his chest defensively, and he's leaning against the mantelpiece. A fire burns in the fireplacesending out a warmth that I can't feel, whilst I stand here with what feels like despair wrapping its cold fingers round my heart.
“It's our legacy,” he tells me, and he’s completely closed off, withdrawn from me and giving me the bare facts. But there’s a pleading look in his blue eyes, begging me to understand. “We must show that we are worthy to take over our roles in the company one day.”
I just gape at him.This is all about business?
“I don't understand,” I reply, looking into his sharp blue eyes, silently asking him to explain it to me. To tell me this isn’t just about money and lining their pockets.
“A few years back, we were all taken to a cabin in the Rockies,” Loki begins out of the blue, his low voice making me ache to be surrounded by his warmth. I look over to him, still standing nearby, arms at his sides, like he can't bear to be too far away from me.
“Loki…” Ash growls out, standing up, his whole body bristling.
Loki spins towards him. “She deserves to know the whole fucked up story, Ash!” Loki shouts, getting up in Ash's face. They stay like that for a few moments, chests heaving and gazes locked.
“Fine,” Ash snaps out, turning his back on Loki, and grabbing his drink before sitting back down.
“We thought it was some team building shit that they, our fathers, kept putting us through. I guess it was in a way.” Loki lets out a cruel chuckle. It's a sound I've never heard from him before, and I hate it. “We arrived, and they took us down to the basement.” He closes his eyes, tilting his head back, hands running over his hair. “There was a...mark, a target in the basement. Tied and gagged.” He looks at me then, and the pain and loathing in his eyes takes me aback, my pounding heart stuttering in my chest. “They told us that now that wewere older, and if we ever wanted to take over the business, we needed to learn what had to be done when someone got in our way. When someone knows too much, or tries to cross us.” He stops, his eyes hard, yet asking me to understand why they’ve committed such atrocities. But I don't. Not yet.
“What happened?” I whisper, not wanting the story to continue, but needing to know the truth about these guys. “What did you have to do?” I ask, dreading the answer, but desperate for the truth.
“We each took turns beating the shit out of him,” Kai's soft melodic voice sounds out. Only, it's got a hard quality to it now.
“You could have refused,” I counter quietly. “You could have said no.”
“Pretty hard to say no with a gun to your head,Princess,” Ash scoffs.
“Wh–what?” I ask, shocked, my gaze flitting to his sharp one. I seem to be asking this question a lot tonight, like a broken fucking record.
“Ourfathers,”Ash spits the word out like it leaves a bad taste in his mouth. “Or in Kai's case his uncle, held guns to our heads, saying that if we couldn't prove that we were men enough to do what was best for the company, then we didn't deserve a seat at the table. Jax and I protested loudly, calling their bluff.” Ash doesn't finish his sentence, but Kai steps in.
“But then my uncle clicked off the safety and shot me in the shoulder,” he says quietly, and I turn my gaze on him. He looks tired, and there is a guilt in his eyes as he briefly looks at the others.Does he blame himself for that night?
“He shot you?!” I all but screech, my eyes travelling over him as if I can see the wound.
How could their own families do this to them?
“He said next time he wouldn't miss,” Ash adds, his face full of pain.
“Unbeknownst to us, they filmed the whole thing. They have proof and use it against us at every fucking opportunity,” Loki finishes, and he looks so hopeless, his arms loose at his sides, that my heart breaks anew for these guys.
“B–but, they're your family! What kind of fucked up shit is that?” I ask, no one answers, as we all know it's above and beyond fucked. I can't fathom having the people who are meant to love you, protect you at all costs, be willing to destroy you. To hurt you. To kill you.
I look at Loki who's still standing close to me, and the bleakness on his face breaks my heart and makes my very soul wail. Yet, how can I reconcile the fact that they badly hurt people, with the guys who I have feelings for? Who I’m falling for?
I feel so churned up, full of anger, sorrow, and betrayal. It's like they've ripped my beating heart right out of my fucking chest, devouring it and leaving me an empty shell. It’s all so overwhelming, and I don’t know how to process any of it. And it’s all tied up with fucking crimson ribbons that bind me so tightly, there’s no hope of escape.
Dizziness washes over me, my limbs cold and my breaths shallow as panic flares brightly inside me.
“I...I will go sleep in one of the spare rooms,” I say haltingly, starting to back away, as my flight mode screams at me to run.
“Lilly, please don't run away,” Loki asks desperately, a look of sorrow in his eyes that rips my soul apart even more until there is nothing left.
He takes a step towards me, and again I step back, flinching and putting distance between us. His face falls further, and he slumps against the side of the sofa in defeat.
“You know we'd never hurt you, don't you, Baby Girl?” Jax asks, his deep voice that usually soothes me, raspy as he takes a step away from the mantle in my direction.
My eyes flit from Jax, to Loki, to Kai, and finally to Ash, who has become cold and distant again.
