Page 7 of Her Name in Red
“Don't summon me here again, Mother,” I say, the word 'mother' dripping with contempt. “You're dead to me, and so is this house.”
As I walk towards the door, my fingers trail along the wallpaper. It's the same pattern it's always been, pale blue roses on a cream background. If I press hard enough, I can feel the slight indentation where a fist once punched through, leaving a hole that was quickly plastered over and papered. Just another secret buried within these walls.
As I reach for the doorknob, I pause. Without turning around, I speak one last time, my voice carrying easily through the stillness. “Oh, and Mother? If you ever try to pretend he wasn't a monster again, I'll make sure the whole town sees how truly ugly you are.”
As soon as I step outside, I take a deep breath, letting the cool air fill my lungs, pushing out the stale, suffocating air of that goddamn house.
I start walking back toward my apartment and pull out my phone, scrolling mindlessly through social media. It's a habit I can't seem to break, even though I know it's just going to piss me off. Sure enough, my feed is full of smiling faces and party pics. Look at all these happy, normal people living their happy, normal lives.
I'm about to shove my phone back in my pocket when a post catches my eye. It's from one of the cheerleaders, Brittany or Tasha or whoever.
Theta Chi's 'Myths and Legends' party is LIT! The whole hockey team is here!
A slow smirk spreads across my face. If the whole team is there, that means Riggs is there too. My heart does a weird little flip at the thought of him, and I hate myself for it.
I change direction, my feet carrying me towards Greek Row without conscious thought. The closer I get, the louder the music becomes, pulsing through the air like a living thing. I can feel the bass in my chest.
As I round the corner, the Theta Chi house comes into view. It's lit up like a carnival, with strings of lights crisscrossing the front yard.
I pause at the edge of the property, suddenly unsure. What the fuck am I doing here?
Chapter 3
Riggs
The Theta Chi house is a goddamn zoo tonight. Bodies everywhere, packed so tight you can barely move without grinding up against someone. Music pounds through the walls, but I barely hear it over the roar of voices and laughter.
I don't want to be here. My skin feels too tight, like it's trying to crawl off my body. There's too much energy thrumming through me, too many thoughts ricocheting around in my skull. The ice wasn't enough to quiet them tonight. Not after I saw her.
My teammates practically dragged me here. “You've been brooding too much, Rhodes,” Martinez said, clapping me on the back. “Time to live a little.”
But this doesn't feel like living. It feels like drowning in a sea of fake smiles and hollow conversations. I weave through the crowd, muttering half-assed apologies as I bump into people. A girl in a skimpy Medusa costume winks at me, her plastic snake headpiece bobbing precariously. I barely register her existence as I push past. It’s not even Halloween yet.
I spot Johnson by the keg, his Viking helmet askew as he does a keg stand. The crowd around him cheers, counting up to some ridiculous number. It's all so fucking pointless.
I grab a red cup from a nearby table, not caring what's in it. The liquid burns going down, but I welcome the sensation. Anything to dull the razor-sharp edges of my thoughts.
My eyes scan the room, searching for an escape route. Maybe I can just Irish goodbye my ass right out of here.
I shake my head, trying to dislodge the image of Maren that's been burned into my retinas since this afternoon. The way she looked at me, like she could see right through me. Like she knew every dark thought I've had this past year.
“Riggs!” A voice cuts through the din. I turn to see Amber making her way towards me. She's dressed as some kind of fairy, glitter sparkling on her cheeks. “I didn't think you'd show up!”
I force a smile, but it feels more like a grimace. “Yeah, well, here I am.”
Amber laughs, the sound too high and too fake. She leans in close, her breath hot against my ear. “Want to get out of here? Find somewhere quieter?”
A year ago, I would have jumped at the chance. Amber's hot, she's into me, and she's offering an escape from this hellhole. But now? The thought of going anywhere with her makes my stomach churn.
“Sorry,” I mutter, stepping back. “I need some air.”
I don't wait for her response, just turn and push my way through the crowd. I need to get out of here before I suffocate.
The cool night air hits me as I stumble out onto the front porch.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I try and go over plays in my head. Nothing feels right anymore except hockey. Not school, not my social life.
“Hey, Captain!” Johnson's voice cuts through my thoughts. He's grinning, a stupid foam sword in one hand and a red Solo cup in the other. “You gotta check out the basement. They've got this whole 'Underworld' thing set up. It's sick!”
