Page 50 of Nothing to Fear
I combust, my cock responding to his words on instinct. I come hard, filling his ass with my cum. He takes every bit, turning his head and claiming my mouth, sucking on my tongue as my orgasm barrels through me, swallowing all of my moans that he’s earned and are his to keep.
When the pleasure ebbs, I drop my forehead against his shoulder and breathe heavily.
“Jesus Christ.”
“I love fucking you.”I love you.
Chapter 20
Silas
“Tell me your fears.”
Asher’s words are whispered against my shoulder, his breath warm on my skin. His fingers trail up and down my side, over my hip and thigh and back again, a slow caress that I feel down to the marrow of my bones.
“Everything. But mostly not ever being myself out in the open.”
“Fear is what’s stopping you?”
“I hide behind it. In some ways, it was easier to just stay the course. In others, it’s been the loneliest time of my life. I never had a reason until now to want to change anything.”
Asher’s hands grip my chin, forcing me to arch and look back at him as he looms over me. His eyes are dark and serious, and when he speaks, his voice is a deep baritone—ruthless and severe.
“You’re enough of a reason, Silas.” He punctuates every word like he’s stabbing a knife into me. “Living the life you want is enough of a reason. Being authentically yourself . . . do you have any idea how amazing you are?”
“You mean when I’m not pretending to be an asshole?”
“Obviously.”
“I know that I feel amazing when I’m wholly myself. When we’re together, I feel more me than I have in a very long time.”
“I’m not rushing you, but I want that for you. I want you to spend the rest of your time at Corvus being yourself, out in the open, with no fucks to give.”
“With you?”
“Yes, with me, baby. Like I said, if you try to run again, I will chase you down.”
Warmth fills my entire body, from the tip of my toes to the top of my head, a comfort I’ve never felt before, except with Asher. I don’t want to lose it. Of all the things I’ve experienced here at Corvus, I’d walk away from all of them if it meant I could keep Asher. His warmth, his acceptance, his brilliance that shines wherever he goes, his huge, open heart, and how kind he is to others. How his pursuit of knowledge hasn’t hardened him. Asher is everything that is inherently good. And I want to keep him.
“How did we get here, Asher?”
Gentle fingers trace along my hairline, rubbing softly against my temple.
“Fate.”
The dining hallis packed when I walk in for dinner. Asher is eating a plateful of food and sitting at a table in the middle of the room when I spot him. His midnight-black hair is perfectly styled around his face, those dark onyx orbs so focused on the book in front of him while he eats. I grab my food and see a table full of my teammates next to Asher. My footsteps hesitate, momentarily being torn in two places. As if my paths werelaid out in front of me, and this is where I decide what kind of life I’m going to live from this moment on.
The overhead lights flicker as a rumble of thunder shakes the very foundation of the dining hall we stand in. Asher’s face lifts up, his eyes immediately meeting my own. The smile that fills his face is so genuine that my heart melts. He’s so beautiful.
Without thinking further, I walk over to him, everything around us fading into an abyss of nothingness. Asher’s eyes flick with surprise and then settle into something that resembles pride. I’ve seen it once before, just for a moment when we were studying.
“What doyou make of the imagery here?”
Asher leans in, our shoulders brushing as we sit next to each other, sharing the text. Just like every time before it, his touch ignites something inside me, burning, lighting me up.
“I think he’s lonely. He misses her, and his mind is playing tricks on him. His life was once vibrant and beautiful, but from the moment he lost her, darkness shrouded every inch of his life. It’s a metaphor for his internal feelings, his anguish, his guilt.”
Asher looks up from the text, smiling brightly at me.
