Page 127 of Nerdplay
“Don’t sweat it. You didn’t miss anything you haven’t seen or done before.”
“I’m not talking about camp, Cricket.”
I push down the knot in my throat. “I’m sorry you wasted your time.”
A wistful look passes across his features. “This place could never be a waste of time, Cricket. You’ve got something special here. I’m glad you’re not selling it.”
“Thanks. That means a lot.”
“That being said, I won’t register next year if you’d rather I not be here. I totally understand.”
My chest constricts. I see him now with clear eyes and a cleansed heart. “As far as I’m concerned, you’ll always be welcome here, Patrick.” Everybody needs a safe space to be their authentic selves, even those struggling to figure out exactly what that entails.
“I hope everything works out for you, Cricket. You deserve it.” He slings his bag over his shoulder and lopes away.
I watch him go, waiting for the waterworks or the racing heart or the sweaty palms.
I’m relieved to feel nothing at all.
“Cricket!” Fiona’s voice breaks through my breakthrough. “Are you ready? Everyone’s waiting for you.”
“Right. I’m coming.” I follow her to the cafeteria, where a quick count of heads tells me I am the last to arrive. As usual, Bernie has prepared vanilla and chocolate cupcakes with Nerds candy as a decorative topping.
“I’m glad to see the cupcakes,” Fiona says. “I was going to riot if Bernie didn’t make them this year.”
I don’t mention that my tight budget almost didn’t allow for them, but I sacrificed a few other items during the week to insure the presence of the ceremonial cupcakes.
“Where’s Patrick?” Laura asks.
“He left,” I say.
Gloria raises her eyebrows. “He actually said goodbye?”
“I guess people can change when they really want to.” I will not think about Charlie. Will. Not.
“We should get started,” Laura says. “Some of us have longer drives than others and the weather seems iffy.”
“Too bad Charlie isn’t here for this,” Olivia says.
I wince at the mention of his name as Ben quietly shushes her.
“What?” Olivia looks at him, genuinely oblivious. “He should be here. He’s one of us.”
“I’m not sure that he is, sweetheart.” The disappointment in Ben’s voice crushes me. Charlie didn’t just let me down, he let down everyone at camp.
I gather my resolve. “We should start.” I refuse to let Charlie or anybody else ruin this final moment with my friends, not when I have to wait so long for the next one to roll around.
Gloria seems to sense my distress, because she moves to stand next to me in solidarity. “He isn’t worth it, Cricket.”
“They never are,” Angela agrees. “Except when they leave you a small fortune. Then they’re financially worth it.”
I climb up to stand on a bench and address the group. “It’s that time again, friends.” An audible groan follows. “I know, I know. Trust me. But short and sweet is what makes these two weeks so special. I’d like to thank you all for choosing to spend your precious time and money at Comic-Camp. It means so much to me to gather like-minded people who love and respect one another.” Emotions clog my throat as I force myself to continue. “This world is full of challenges, but at the end of the day I know I have a team supporting me and that makes all the difference.”
“I’d carry you that last leg to Mordor,” Bradley interjects. “Uphill in bare feet.”
“I’d battle a hellmouth for you all,” Hunter says.
“It’s not a competition,” I tell them, and my mind immediately conjures an image of Charlie. I mentally punch through it. “Everybody raise a cupcake. May the Force be with you.”
