Page 84 of Nerdplay
“It’s not contentious, but Olivia is taking it hard.”
“As one would expect.”
“Yeah,” I say. “It came as a shock to Ben too. He didn’t know how unhappy they were. He feels guilty for not being as attuned to his son as he thinks he should’ve been.”
Charlie falls silent. Finally he says, “Ben shouldn’t feel bad. He’s a good dad. I can tell.”
“And a good grandfather too.”
“My father wouldn’t have a clue if I was having problems.”
“Because he isn’t attuned to you or because you hide them from him?”
He shoots me a curious look that I don’t quite understand. “Both. My father isn’t interested in feelings, only achievements. Our conversations consist of whether I finalized any big deals and when I can expect to make partner.”
“That’s a fairly limited conversation.”
“I prefer it that way.”
“I’m sorry,” I say.
His head swings to me. “Why are you sorry? You’re not my father.”
“I’m sorry that your relationship with him isn’t what it should be. You deserve loving parents.”
He ponders me. “I get the sense you had loving parents.”
Now it’s my turn to grow quiet. “My mom was amazing.”
“How old were you when she died?”
“Sixteen.”
“You must have good memories of her.”
“Yes and no. Sometimes they’re hazier than I’d prefer. When you don’t have anyone to reminisce with, it feels harder to keep those memories alive.”
He looks like I killed his favorite plant. “You don’t have any family?”
I imagine my smile is as rueful as I feel. “No blood relations. I’m an only child, and so were my parents.”
He takes a minute to process this and then says, “Well, family isn’t everything. Sometimes they’re downright shitty.”
“Oh, I know, believe me. Ask around. Plenty of campers have horror stories. I wouldn’t wish Gloria’s mother on my worst enemy.”
“She’s the one with dementia?”
“Alzheimer’s. But I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about the kind of mother she was before she developed the condition.”
“Are we talking Medea or Matilda’s mom?”
I laugh at his literary references. “She’s a momster. Repeatedly told Gloria she wished she’d not had a child. That if it weren’t for Gloria, she would’ve been a Broadway star. That getting pregnant ruined her life.”
Charlie lets loose a low whistle. “Yet Gloria has dedicated her adult life to wiping the drool from the chin of the woman who treated her like that?”
“Because she’s a saint in sheep’s clothing. In a twisted way, Gloria prefers this version of her mother. She’s kinder and seems to appreciate Gloria more than the younger version ever did.”
He drags a hand through his hair. “That’s gotta be rough for her.”
