Page 13 of Part of Forever
I went on a date tonight.
It was fine for a first date (Grace thinks it was lame). There was a group of us (three couples, six people) and we ate dinner at some tiny little place I’d never even heard of. It wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t great. Then we went and watched some Avengers movie at one of the guys’ houses. I don’t know which one it was, I honestly had no clue what was going on the entire time.
My date’s name is Ryan. The whole time, one of the girls (who I don’t know) kept saying how cute it was that his name is Ryan and my name is Rosie. I think she might have been jealous. I’m not sure.
But I went on a date.
Mom was thrilled.
Yes. You read that right. She was thrilled I went on a date with someone who isn’t Tucker, even though I’m only 14, and she is always talking about how that’s too young to be dating. She’s also convinced that Tucker is gonna wreck my life because of reasons she won’t share with me, but she’s made it very, very clear that I’m not allowed to date boys—especially not him.
But she was really, really happy when Ryan picked me up tonight. I don’t think we’ll go out again, though, because I’m pretty sure he likes that girl who kept talking about our names since he watched her most of our date. So. Yup.
Are first dates always like this? Weird, awkward, and a little uncomfortable? Or just for me? Grace has been on dates with Leo before, but they always sound so fun…
I went on a date, but not with Tucker. I don’t know why I keep writing that or why that matters. Okay.
For real going to bed now, before Mom peeks in and wants to talk about my date…
Love, Rosie
June 17
Dear Journal,
I’ve only heard bits and pieces about what happened between Tucker and his dad, but today, he told me more of the story.
I guess growing up, he was always going to big shows that his dad was doing whenever he went on tour. This was before he started school, so he got to go more often. He idolized his dad. I mean, if my dad was a famous singer, I’d probably think the world of him, too.
But then, when Tucker was 7, his dad left for a tour and never came back. His mom told him that it wasn’t his fault (he had been very worried about that) and that his dad just needed to figure some stuff out.
By this point, he was already taking guitar lessons because he loved music.
As he got older, it got harder to live in Nashville because his dad was still there, too, even if he never actually saw him. He performed at some smaller gigs in the summer, and then he got the call about a record deal.
Until then, I don’t think he had ever really voiced how much he wanted to follow in his dad’s footsteps and make it big. He was young and really humble (okay, he still is and I’m also making this sound like this was like 5 years ago, but it was just a few months before he moved here).
So he went to the studio. He started sharing his songs with the producer, and then his dad walked in! The producerjumped up and talked to his dad about how happy he was to be able to snag up Tucker Bensen this young, and kept saying thanks to his dad.
That’s when he stormed out, furious. But I guess word got around and that’s how Murphy became his manager and got him out to LA, but then that record deal fell through.
He really wants to do this whole music thing on his own. Even if his dad is famous, not many people know that yet and he doesn’t really want them to.
And I can kinda see now why he really doesn’t like his dad. After so many years of just being gone, he decides to swoop in and help Tucker’s music career take off, just because he can. What a jerk.
I hope Tucker does get his dreams. I hope he can get whatever he wants, without the help of his lame father.
Love, Rosie
5
I try notto twitch as the MRI machine clanks and moves above me. I close my eyes and try to focus on the music the tech picked out for me. When he asked what station I wanted to listen to, I told him to pick, because I always let them choose the music.
Sometimes they’ll pick a Spotify station that I like, and other days I know they chose music they’re a fan of. Today we’re listening to country music, and I can’t decide if it’s what the tech guy thought I would like, or what he likes. Because with his hipster glasses and styled hair, he doesn’t really seem like the country type.
One song ends, and the next song that starts makes me think of Tucker. I squeeze my eyes shut even tighter. I do not want to be thinking about him right now, but my mind doesn’t listen to me. As the words of the song fill my head, all I can picture is the two of us, sitting on a blanket, and him kissing me on the Fourth of July.
My eyes fly open.
