Page 22 of Begin Again
“Okay,” I tell him, ignoring the disappointment that crashes through me. Sam’s got another new girl. I shouldn’t be surprised. Ever since we moved to New York and I told him to date other people, he has been. It’s been almost five years since Ishut things down between him and I still struggle with it. But, I can’t exactly be mad, he did exactly what I told him to do.
“Has Noah shut up about Tally yet?” Sam asks, changing the subject.
“Nope,” I tell him. Every spring, Noah mourns the loss of this girl he met years ago. Saying his only regret was how idiotic he was in not giving her his number. “But it’s almost summer, so maybe he’ll come around and be fine again soon. I’m taking him to a Broadway show tomorrow to get his mind off of it.”
“Good, good,” Sam says, but I can tell he’s distracted. “I’ve got to go. I’ll call when I’m back in the States.”
“See you.”
“See you, sunshine.”
My elation seems to deflate a little after I hang up the phone. Sam is still mine in the way he’s always been, but it’s different now. He’s dating Christina, and she’s there with him and it’s morning. That has to mean something.
My phone vibrates again, this time it is Emily.
Emily
Girl, I knew you’d get the job. I also just googled your new boss *HEART EYES* I hope you become best friends with him.
I swallow thickly as I type out my response.
I honestly can’t believe that I got the job. And he is very, very attractive. All sharp lines and soft eyes. Gah. I’m pretty sure all of my co-workers are already in love with him. And I think I need a new guy best friend. I just talked to Sam. He’s got a new girl. I just called him and it sounded like he was just waking up and he was with her.
My phone rings a minute after I hit send.
“I’m sorry, honey,” Emily says immediately.
I slump on my couch, appetite gone. “I don’t know why I feel so weird about it. He’s dated other women before. I’m the one who told him to date other women. I shouldn’t feel this way.”
“I know, but it’s always going to be weird when he’s with someone else. Everyone back in Kersey always thought it was going to be you and Sam who ended up together.”
I let out a laugh but it sounds more like a gulp. “Whatever.”
“It’s true. I’ve seen the way he looked at you. That man has loved you for a long time.” Emily tells me and my heart pinches.
“I think he finally took my advice to heart and finally moved on.” My voice sounds small, even to me. I shouldn’t care so much. I can’t give Sam the life he wants, and he should be able to be with someone who can give him that. “Maybe it’s time I moved on too. Find a new crush.”
Emily sighs. “Only if you’re ready.”
“I think I need to, so I don’t break my own heart any more than I already have. Sam deserves to be happy.”
“So do you,” she tells me. I know she’s right, I know that I really don’t need a man to make me happy. But having a new crush would be good for me, healthy. A slow grin spreads across my face.
“I know the perfect new crush.”
“Mitch?” Emily asks me as if she can read my mind. “Isn’t he like a decade older than us?”
“So?” I ask. “It would just be a crush, someone I can dream about instead of Sam. It’s perfect. Plus, he’s only like seven years older than us.”
I remember the stern smile that Mitch gave me after offering me the job, and how warm his hand felt when we shook hands before I signed the contract. I know better than to date my boss, but...at some point, he won’t be my boss. Plus, it’s just a crush.
“It’s perfect,” I repeat.
“If you’re sure,” Emily says, but I can hear the wariness in her voice. She doesn’t think this is a good idea. I just have to convince her it will be.
“Trust me, I want to stay friends with Sam, like we’ve always been. I can’t ruin that by letting any sort of feelings get involved. So this is perfect. I’ve got a new crush.”
“I don’t think it works that way.” Emily sounds skeptical. Which makes me laugh, because growing up, she had a new crush every single week.
