Page 50 of The Luck of Finding You
“Wait. Who?” Holly asks, completely alert to what I’m about to say. “Mo? Noah?”
“Noah, actually. Just as friends though. He was there the night Dad announced it, and I kind of didn’t react well. I think I made Beth cry.”
“Oooh,” Holly says. “He seems to be your knight in shining armor a lot, Sis.”
“Are you just going ignore the fact that I might have made Beth cry?”
“No. But this is bigger. Did you ask him, or did he offer?”
“I’m pretty sure I asked him.”
Holly squeals. “That’s so great!”
“How is it great?” I ask. “I went over to his apartment last week when Gran had bingo and we made out, and then I left after telling him I might like someone else. But now it doesn’t matter because we’re going to be in a car for four hours on Friday.”
“Wait. What?” Holly asks. “I really need to get better at not shutting out the world when I’m in creative mode. I feel like I’ve missed everything.”
“Yeah…we kissed. Then I told him about Mo. Now it’s awkward, but he still asked if we could ride together to St. George this weekend. Even though I told him I’m meeting another guy there. But I also kind of really like Noah, even though I don’t want to. What am I going to do?”
Thankfully, I’ve made it home. I turn the car off and sit in the driveway.
“Noah’s going to the event?” Holly asks. I swear she cares about the weirdest details. That is not at all what I would have asked first.
“Yeah. He bought a ticket too. Turns out he also likes her books, and now we’re driving together. Well, he’s driving so I don’t have to.”
“Well, yay for not having to drive!” Holly cheers.
“Holly,” I say with a groan. “I’m riding with a guy I’ve had a weird crush on for the past five years to meet a guy I’ve never actually met, but ever since I told Noah that I also like Mo,” I’m rambling now. “I think I’ve started to like Mo after I realized how good we would be together, even though we’ve never seen each other in person.”
Holly’s quiet for a minute, and while I wait for her to respond, Gran opens the front door. I hold up a finger.
“Well, maybe you can figure out which one you actually want to date,” Holly says.
“Not super helpful.” Even though she’s probably right. This weekend could be good. I get to spend some alone time with Noah and see how things go. And I can meet Mo for the first time. “Or maybe you’re right.”
“I’m always right.” Holly laughs.
“UGH.” I put my head against the steering wheel, causing it to honk again. “What am I going to do?”
“Not kiss Noah again until after you’ve met Mo?” Holly offers.
“Great plan.” I was already planning on that. Should be easy, seeing as he’ll be driving most of the time we’re together. “But it’s still all so confusing. The ‘what if I actually have feelings for Mo,’ and all these feelings with Noah, and Noah isrighthere, and I just don’t know what to do.”
“Trust yourself,” Holly says, just like Olivia told me, which surprises me. Unless it has anything to do with her art, she’s never been a "go with the flow" kind of person. Holly always has a plan and five million rules to go with it. “You’ll figure it out. See what happens this weekend. See what happens with Mo and if there are sparks or not. See what happens with Noah.”
“But isn’t that being disloyal to both of them in some way?”
“Noah knows you’re going to meet another guy, right?” Holly asks.
“Yeah.”
“So just try to be friends with him, see how it goes. And maybe tell Mo you’re getting a ride with a guy friend but that he’s just a friend.”
“Does saying that sound overkill though? Like I’m trying to convince everyone that he’s just a friend?” If someone was trying to convince me they were coming with “just a friend,” I’d probably question it.
“No. It’s just being honest. He is a friend and that’s all he is right now.” For some reason it feels like she’s stuck a knife in my gut, even if what she said is true. It still hurts.
“Okay,” I say, more for myself than her benefit. “I’ll just be honest with both of them about what’s happening. At least the part about me riding with Noah and also going to meet Mo. I’m not sharing my full feelings with anyone yet.”
