Page 5 of The Luck of Finding You
“All right.” I order a hot chocolate, the ham-and-Swiss sandwich, and a Danish. As I wait for my food, I glance around for a place to sit.
Not much has changed since the last time I was here. There’s still a lone booth at the front, the one where I kissed Tally, which is currently full of a family with kids that are jumping up and down and a mom who’s trying to get them to sit still, a task that looks impossible. The rest of the café is full of small circular tables with two chairs at most of them. All the seats are occupied except for one.
That’s when my heart stops.
Because there is no way that the woman sitting alone with an empty chair across from her is the same Tally who’s occupied far too many of my dreams. The woman brushes her bangs out of her eye and turns the page of her book. Her own sandwich sits on the table in front of her untouched. Looking at her, it feels like no time has passed.
I’m still staring when someone touches my arm. “Sir?”
Startled, I turn to the cashier, who’s holding my food. I take the tray from her and walk toward Tally. Maybe I should believe in fate.
“Is this seat taken?” My heart is beating so fast, I’m pretty sure it’s going to escape my body as I ask her the question. She doesn’t even look up from her book as she shakes her head no. From what I can see of the cover, I’d guess she’s reading a historical romance.
I set my food on the small table, hoping that will get her attention, but she still doesn’t look up from the page. I force myself to take a slow, deep breath and move the chair so I can sit. Tally looks up in my direction, but I can tell she doesn’t look at me, more like through me.
“I didn’t think you meant you’d sit at my table.” Her voice is exactly the same, soft and low, and even though she’s snapping, it’s music to my ears and I want to listen to her talk forever.
Her sky-blue eyes finally pierce mine, and I know that the crush I’ve been trying to bury for five years is still alive and well. Cause that’s all this is, a crush. Because you can’t be in love with someone you spent a single afternoon with. At least that’s what I’m trying to convince myself of.
I shrug. “There are no other seats.” There’s a flash of recognition in her eyes as I speak, and I watch as her eyes go wide as they skit across my face, taking me in.
“Fancy meeting you here.” Her voice has gotten quieter, but it’s still sharp around the edges. All the times I fantasized about running into her again, I always imagined the smiling, hopeful girl I met five years ago. Instead, I feel as though I’ve been greeted by the ice queen.
Which I probably deserve, considering how I left things. I made her promise that it would just be an afternoon, and thenIwas the one who brought up a future. Something more. Then I ran away without a word.
“Tally, I—” I start.
She holds up a hand and sets her book down with the other. “Don’t, Noah. I’m not interested in an apology that’s five years too late.”
Crap. This is going worse than I ever could have imagined.
“Okay.” I nod. She won’t quite meet my eyes. “But for the record, I am sorry.”
Tally purses her lips. “Too little, too late.”
“If I could explain,” I start again, because seeing her here is taking me back in time even more than standing outside the café did. Seeing her here makes me feel twenty-one again.
“Of course you want to explain.” Tally rolls her eyes. “I’ve heard all the excuses before. Guys are all the same.”
She doesn’t really believe that, does she? Something burns inside my chest, a desire to prove her wrong. But I need her to put down her icicles before I can try to melt the frozen wall that’s around her heart.
“Look, I am sorry, and I would like a chance to explain. Obviously, that’s up to you if you’ll let me, but for now, could you just look at me?” I’m desperate to see her eyes on mine, for them to light up or have her laugh at a joke. We’ve only been together again for a moment, but already I can see that something is different about her. The light that was there last time seems to be dimmer than before. I want to know why.
“Fine.” Tally looks at me, her cheeks a little pink. I love that even though something is different, she still blushes easily. “What are you doing here anyway? Visiting your grandma?” She says it as if she never believed that’s what I was doing the first day we met.
“Something like that.” It’s not the answer I want to give, but talking about Grandma Marsha being gone with Annie is one thing; I’m not ready to talk about it with other people. It’s too new and fresh. I already heard “I’m so sorry for your loss” so many times at the funeral. I get that people don’t always know what to say at funerals, and that is probably better than nothing. But what are you supposed to say after that? Thank you? I’m not really thankful they’re sorry because it wasn’t their fault. I’m grateful they’re supportive, but I still wish there were some other form of small talk we had for after someone died.
Tally blinks once, her face going still as stone.
My answer clearly doesn’t win me any points. She reaches below the table and sets her bag in her lap. I’m going to lose her. Again.
“Did you hear about Simone’s new book?” I ask, desperate to keep her here and to keep her talking, if only for a few more minutes.
Tally freezes, hand reaching for her book.
“You remember?” The surprise in her voice sends a jolt of energy through my body. How could she think that I wouldn’t remember every single moment of that afternoon together?
“Of course.” My voice is hushed now, like this conversation is sacred. Maybe it is. Tally blinks at me in surprise. After a moment she sets her book back down on the table.
