Page 64 of One Little Kiss
She laughs. “Okay, okay. One more time, for the record…” She clears her throat and gives me the speech she may or may not have given ten times already today. “This is a good thing. You and Noelle clearly have feelings for each other that you’ve been ignoring.”
“And kissing her…”
“Wasn’t a mistake,” Leah fills in.
Yeah. We’ve been over this once or twice…or twenty times.
I’m still not convinced though. I acted impulsively. And in the moment it had felt like…like there was no other option. I’d had to kiss her.
But did I, though?The voice of reason eventually returned and it’s not pulling any punches.
In the cold light of day I can see about eighty other ways I could’ve handled my jealousy.
And yes, I am self-aware enough to admit that I’d been jealous. There’s also no way I can deny that the kiss had been amazing. Epic. It hadn’t been like any kiss I’d ever experienced.
The world had shifted with that kiss. Stars had realigned and planets had fallen into a new orbit.
And yeah…I’m also self-aware enough to admit that I may be being overly dramatic here.
But that’s how it had felt. And so I’d gone with it. I’d embraced the new weird, as it were. I’d shut down the thoughts that said ‘Hey, maybe you shouldn’t go plunging headfirst into a life-changing situation. Maybe you should stop and think instead.’
I’d ignored that and let my more primal instincts win out. I’d let desire win out, and now…
Now I was in too deep. It’s not just too late to cancel. It’s too late to turn back.
That kiss changed things between us, and even though I told Noelle it would just be one date, that we could change our minds and go back to being friends if this failed…
I’m not sure I buy that.
And it’s this thought that has a sweat breaking out on my neck and has me scrubbing my palms against my jeans.
I turn to Leah, “I don’t date.”
Her smile can only be described as condescending. “Yes, I know, my little Casanova. Everyone knows this.”
Including Noelle. I wince and run a hand through my hair. Then I wince again when I realize I just mussed the hair that I’d spent way too long smoothing down and adjusting.
“You’re right. Noelle knows me too well. She knows I don’t do…” I gesture vaguely to myself in the mirror. “I don’t do this. I don’t dodates.”
“But she does,” Leah points out.
“Not helping,” I snap.
She smiles.
She’s having way too much fun watching my distress. Since she’s not evil by nature, I’m assuming she thinks I’m overreacting.
Because I am.
But also…am I?
“She’s giving me one shot, Leah,” I remind her. “One chance to show her I can be more than a friend.”
Her smile fades. Maybe she’s starting to get it.
One date to show Noelle we could have a romantic future versus a lifetime of evidence proving we’re good as friends.
I throw my hands out wide, my heart racing with every minute that passes, bringing me closer to pickup time.
