Page 46 of One Little Kiss
I wince as I suck in another inhale.
Crap, what is this? It feels like my heart’s cracking and my stomach’s getting ready to swallow it whole.
“Wanna talk about it?”
I look up to see Leah leaning across the table, resting on her elbows as she fixes me with a look so understanding and sweet it only makes my chest tighten that much more.
“No,” I practically bark.
She doesn’t seem offended, though. Her head tilts to the side as she arches her eyebrows expectantly.
“I don’t know.” I sigh. And that’s the truth. Idon’tknow.
I have no idea what’s going on here. I don’t know why everything’s changed between me and Noelle, but…
But it has.
I fall forward and my head connects with the wood table with athunk.
I hear a little hiss from Leah as she winces. “That bad, huh?”
I don’t answer.
“This wouldn’t have anything to do with you and Noelle acting all weird around each other, would it?”
My head comes flying up as I gape at my cousin. “What?”
She shrugs, her expression one of regret. “It’s true. And I’m not the only one who’s noticed.”
My brows draw down. “It’s that obvious?”
She sighs. “To the people who care about you? Yes.” When I don’t say anything, she shifts in her seat. “Honestly, it wouldn’t be all that noticeable except that you and Noelle are normally so…easy together.” Her smile is small and soft. “I always envied your friendship for that reason. I don’t think I have any friends who I’m so comfortable, andmyself,around.” Her eyes widen. “Except you, obviously. But that’s different.”
I nod because I get it. Family is one thing, but to have that sort of ease and unconditional love with a friend is rare. And amazing.
And I’m messing it all up.
Her smile gets a little dreamy. “And now I have Ben, obviously.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose, taking another deep inhale because apparently some part of me is sure this newfound attraction to Noelle is due to a lack of oxygen.
Except…it’s not newfound.
Not at all. I’ve nevernotbeen aware of Noelle’s good looks or her sex appeal. Not since I was old enough to understand these things. It’s more like…I was really, really good at ignoring it.
A champ, honestly. If one could go pro at compartmentalizing, I’d have taken the gold medal.
So what’s wrong with me now? Why can’t I go back to ignoring the fact that my best friend has the sort of lips that beg to be kissed and the way she smells makes me want to pull her into my arms, and her skin is so…
I fall back in my seat with a groan. “Something’s wrong with me.”
“What is it?” Leah’s all hopeful. Like maybe she can fix this. “Come on, Eli. You’re always there for me when I need someone. Let me be there for you.”
She sounds so earnest I can’t say no, even if I want to. With a sigh, I let my head fall back so I’m staring up at the stained, popcorned ceiling. I can’t actually maintain eye contact with my sweet little cousin while I say this aloud. “I think I…I kinda…” I clear my throat and shut my eyes. “I kinda have a thing for Noelle.”
Leah’s silence makes me wildly uncomfortable. I can’t believe I’m feeling this way, let alone admitting it aloud. It makes me the worst sort of friend.
It feels like the worst sort of betrayal. I’m not supposed to see her like that.
