Page 92 of Hunter
“It’s the shelter,” Alvi says in a tough tone of voice while he leans forward to reach inside the pocket of the seat in front of him. He pulls out a solid black gun, and a calmness washes over him as he holds it up to inspect it.What the fuck?!
“If anyone, including that fucking crazy girl, goes near my wife,” he pauses and checks the chamber for bullets.Wait, what?!I hear both my brother and Max inhale a sharp breath, and I’m honestly not sure if it’s because of the wifey bomb that Alv just dropped, or the fucking gun that he casually just whipped out, “I’ll fucking kill ‘em.”Not if I do it first.
“Go around to the front of the shop,” Alv shouts, and the driver slows down to park in front of Rossi Ink. I’m already opening the back door before he’s got the car stopped. I don’t give a fuck. I can’t wait for his guy to parallel park this beast of a car. I need to fucking get out, and I need to go get my girl now.
SESENTA
I hadn’t thoughtabout that gun in two years. I knew exactly where it was and how to use it if I had to,gracias, Señora Úrsula,but it wasn’t somethingthat I was out here actively thinking about.
It wasn’t always like that, though. I couldn’t fucking take it in the beginning and thought about ending it all, all the time. I locked that shit up, both my emotions and the fucking stolen gun. I felt so much better when I no longer had that shit on me.
I picked it up from a dead gangbanger, and Señora Úrsula showed me how to handle it in her living room with the curtains shut and the broken ass blinds pulled down. She agreed to keep it there for me if I did some bullshit errands for her. I had to do them for theabuelasanyway, so I didn’t mind.
I went to the store for her, got her mail, took her trash out, and shit like that. I ended up keeping that piece there until I left. She was leaving too, and got out a few days before the gang unit raid on the block happened.
I did my fucking best to help time that shit right. I wanted to make sure that she was gone before I flipped on the OGs. I couldn’t let her get caught up; she was going to take care of her sick older sister down in NOLA, and I know she meant it when she told me to look her up if I got out of the Bronx.Maybe one day I will.
When I lifted that lock box and swiped Amy’s key, I was once again trying to crawl the fuck out of a really bad place. I wanted to just end it all. Every day felt too hard to live through, and Iliteralmentekept thinking that I wasn’t supposed to survive this. It was like I had pushed fate and created my own timeline.
I relied on HecateyLilith,ymyself. I knew that if I was gonna try to get through this, then I had to stash the piece; I couldn’t have it on me anymore. It made me fucking anxious having it with me all the time, like it would be so easy to just pull the trigger and get it over with. At least if I decided to take the percs, I could get my stomach pumped. A bullet to the brain seemed harder to Uno reverse.
To be honest, I knew I’d be safer without it, kinda like it being outta sight and outta mind. I promised myself I’d only comeback for it if shit went sideways. I knew one day I’d need it for protection…y parece que hoy es ese día, and today is that day.
Lo hice, I made it.I put my hands on my knees and try to catch my breath when I finally make it to the back lot of the shelter. It’s dark, and I’m fucking thankful that I knew how to avoid the motion-sensored lights and that Amy forgot to turn the lights on again. I lean up against her parked car, and from what I can tell, I made it here undetected.Gracias, diosas.
Hunter keeps calling me, and I cancel call after call. I need to get in contact with Amy first. I take in big gulps of air while trying to fucking breathe. I type out a text to see if she’ll open the back door since I can’t catch my breath.
I ran the majority of the way here, and I need to calm the fuck down so that I can do what I need to do when I get inside. It’s quiet hours, and if I make noise in there, then I’ll be fucked.
I reach behind my body for the side zipper pocket so that I can dig out the key I need, and my hands start to fiercely flap around. I hit myself instead as I try to feel for the bag on my back… but it’s not there.¡No mames, wey!
¡Carajo!The one day I didn’t bring my fucking shit with me! I didn’t bring anything.¡NA-DA!Just my phone. I left everything behind! I hadliteralmentelocked my backpack with the key that I need right now in Hunter’s fucking room. The fucking irony. I can’t.
My horoscope was right today; it was as if Hecate herself was warning me. It said ‘Something vital slips from your grasp today, Aquarius, though you may not notice until it’s too late. A task, a promise, or a truth buried in your memory will resurface at the worst possible moment, leaving you exposed. The more you strain to remember, the more it will twist away from you, hiding in the corners of your mind like a shadow that refuses the light. Be cautious–what you forget will not be forgiving, and the consequences will not wait patiently.’
I panicked when I read that ominous message on my app, but Hunter assured me that everything was going to be okay, and I wanted so fucking badly to believe that I could have something good.
I’m fucked in more ways than one right now, because the stars are aligning before my very eyes as headlights illuminate the dark parking lot and my spot at the back stairs. I’m waiting for Amy to open the fucking door, and I swear the longer that I stand out here, the more I feel eyes on me. It’s like they’re coming from all directions, but I can’t really tell.
I wish Amy would turn the fucking lights on back here.She never fucking does, so I know it’smis diosaswhen they finally turn on in the parking lot.
SIXTY-ONE
It feelslike I just walked onto the set of a movie during a live-action sequence. I could hear someone jumping out of the Tahoe to run after me as soon as my feet hit the sidewalk, and instinctively knew that it was Alvi, hot on my trail. I was on a fucking mission and bolted down the block to get around the building.
I was still tracking Ed and had that fucking dot zoomed in as far as it would go. From what I could tell, she was still outside the shelter. I stopped in the middle of the road to determine thefastest way to get there when Alvi, my brother, and Max finally caught up to me.
“YOU WERE GOING TO THROW THE FUCKING GAME AND YOU DIDN'T FUCKING TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON?!” Chase screams while running as fast as he can toward me.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, HUNTER?! WE’RE FUCKING BROTHERS, MAN!” he shouts, pushing his hands into my chest and shoving me back a step. It knocks me down a peg when it registers in my brain that he fucking called me ‘Hunter.’ He rarely calls me that, and it sounds fucking bizarre coming from him. “AND WE’RE FUCKING TEAMMATES!” he adds, balling his fists at his sides. He’s pissed, and I get it, but I know that he would’ve done the same to save Red if the roles were reversed.
“I had to hear this fucking shit from Tommy after you jumped out of a moving car like a fucking madman. That’s not fucking okay,” he adds. He sounds slightly calmer before raising his voice again. We’re all out on the street in the middle of the fucking night, and although it’s just us, I can sense that there are others out here. “And then he tells me all this shit about Ediso–”
“You’re fucking done now,” I tell his ass as soon as he tries to say her name. We step into each other so that we’re chest to chest, nose to nose. He’s holding me up out here and wasting time that we don’t have.
He’s expecting answers right now, and that’s not gonna fucking happen. He can get mad later. Big mad, I don’t give a fuck. Throw a tantrum if he has to, but right here–right now, is not the time.
“This is for me to handle alone. For once, I have something that’s mine that I don’t have to fucking share with anyone else. She not only needs me right now, but she’s fucking countingon me. This is my fucking redemption from every fucked up, shitty–”
