Page 45 of Discord
“Honestly, I’d take some time for myself. Take both beauty and online classes at Yale to see what I like best. As for Brandon… You complain about your family sheltering you, but codependency goes both ways.” It was nothing the four of us hadn’t heard before. “Brandon is right about needing to cut the umbilical cord, but you can’t just turn him into another person who takes care of you.”
I didn’t refute Chris’ accusations. He was right on all accounts. But… “I promised Brandon I wouldn’t change my mind about us.”
“I’m not suggesting changing your mind. I have no doubt that your feelings for each other are genuine. If that’s the case, taking some time apart shouldn’t alter how you feel. So, if I were you, I wouldn’t choose a boyfriend or do what my family wants. Instead, I’d put things on hold, try a few classes to see if college is the right fit, and explore life as an adult without someone taking care of me at every turn.”
I opened my mouth only to snap it shut. My feelings for Brandon would never change. I had lived with them my entire life. A few months, nor a few years, would put a dent in it.Could he possibly feel the same?
“Personally, it seems Raven’s suggestion is the most logical one. If you wait until you’re older, it’ll solve a lot of the issues, too. Who knows, your family might not be so against it then.”
I wouldn’t hold my breath, but I understood Chris’ indication. Except, I was petrified Brandon wouldn’t wait for me. It wasn’t fair to ask him to put his life on hold. However, was it fair to put him in a precarious position, leaving him vulnerable to the vultures if word got out about us?
“I can’t imagine life without him,” was all I could mumble.
“If he feels the same, then you have nothing to worry about,” Chris countered. “What’s meant to be will be.”
Chris was acutely poetic at times. I closed my eyes after hanging up the phone and leaned against my pillow to mull over his advice. It was dawn by the time I made my decision. I knew exactly what had to be done.
Mia
I finally took a shower,stole another one of Raven’s outfits, then hopped in an Uber. I had texted Brandon about meeting at his apartment around one p.m. It was the most convenient location to speak without an audience, though my stomach was already churning at the conversation to be had. The solution I had come up with was the most logical one, but would he agree?
“Hi there,” the driver greeted brightly. “How are you today?”
Terrible. Instead of saying so, I settled for a simple, “Hello.” My nerves flayed as we passed the blocks until arriving at our destination.
“Here you go.” The Uber driver pulled up outside Brandon’s apartment building.
I gathered myself slowly and exited the car. “Thank you.”
I lifted my head to take in the sight of the tall apartment complex that had become oh-so-familiar and fiddled with the key fob Brandon had granted me. After some hesitancy, I swiped the fob to enter the building and walked toward the elevators. The smooth elevator ride did nothing to pacify my jumbled nerves. By the time I reached his floor and walked to his apartment, my legs weighed me down.
Deep breaths. In and out. I reminded myself that this was for the best. I jiggled the lock and pushed open the door. My eyes darted past the foyer and into the living room. Brandon stood by the bar area. He swirled an amber drink in his hand and appeared to be contemplating his next drink option. Brandon never drank when I came over, possibly as a consideration to my underaged self. To see the generous pour in his glass set the tone for our conversation.
He sported a slight stubble, though the jeans and black t-shirt look was spot on with the unruly and sexy-as-fuck hair. Brandon tended to mask his emotions, but today his dark eyes were wholly indecipherable. Closed off. I shut the door and walked toward him, stopping anxiously with a few feet between us.
“Hi. How are you?”
“Peachy.” The word seemed innocent, but the bite in it sounded bitter.
“We should talk. I came here to tell you—”
“It’s over,” he cut me off with a challenge to his tone.
Shards of ice cut me open upon hearing the words. How in the hell was I to return to a normal life after experiencing life with this man? He had been my singular pursuit for so long. To have him, to feel him on top of me, to experience what’s between us... no one compared to him.
But you must be willing to lose the battle to win the war.
“I don’t want it to be.”
Skepticism covered his features. “What did Raven say to you?” he asked.
“She asked us to wait, then reevaluate our relationship.”
Understanding crossed his face. He scoffed. “Let me guess. You agreed to it without a fight.”
Ouch. “Not without a fight,” I said slowly, the lump in my throat moving. How could he sound so callous? The first of my family just found out about us, and he seemed dismissive as ever. “But she does have a point,” I admitted faintly. “Things might be different for us if we wait until the age gap isn’t so significant.”
He shook his head. “I suppose you have a figure in mind.”
