Page 128 of Isolation
It’s not because of some stupid love triangle between brothers, or other dramatic telenovela reasons.
That thought is only crossing my mind because of the most human reason of all, our own demons.
It stems from the agony of not finding an alternative that won’t destroy the woman I love without giving her up. In many ways, I fell in love with her even more than before. I finally love her more than I love myself.
I finally love her enough to say the words that I never thought I’d utter to her. "We can do this however you want. I won’t force you to seek professional guidance. But if being around me means that you are going to get worse, then I'll let you go. I'll do anything if it means that I don't have to watch you get destroyed."
“I can’t watch you get destroyed either,” she whispers back. Raven holds me tighter as if she is trying to mold me into her. I can barely hear her against my chest. “What happens now?”
Silence. The room is engulfed with a suffocating silence instead of an answer that reflects our truth. There is no acceptable answer or solution that either of us wants to hear.
So, there can only be silence.
CHAPTER 15
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Milo
The room has been filled with pin-drop silence for minutes. We are both quiet.
The direction of this conversation is leading towards something neither of us want to acknowledge.
Instead, I stare at her, hoping to somehow freeze this moment. How can two people can love each other this damn much, but it’s still not enough?
An unbearable anguish has been battling inside me since that realization. It’s wreaking havoc on my organs, my mind, and my heart.
Our future seems too bleak. I need a better outcome, even if it’s imaginary.
“I am going to marry you in the Greek isles,” I finally break the silence. “You always wanted to visit Greece.”
“Milo—”
“We could go to the Amalfi Coast afterward, for our honeymoon. I went there once, and I always wanted to take you there.”
“Why are you doing this?” she asks faintly.
I reposition myself on the couch so I can take her into a spooning position, with an arm around her waist.
I am aware of how far-fetched my thoughts are based on what we discussed.
“Humor me,” I drop my forehead on her shoulder blade. “You like imaginary worlds and hypothetical situations. Make one with me.”
Raven stays quiet. She draws lines with her fingers on the arm I have around her waist.
“Rave,” I telepathically plead for her to give in. I just had to talk about something that I never thought possible. I have to find a way to deal with this.
“Maybe a sunset ceremony in Santorini,” Raven sighs. “I have heard that Santorini has the best sunsets in the world.”
I kiss her temple, grateful that she is going along with this. “Then, we could come back to New York and redo my condo, the way you like it.”
I see a frown forming. Raven is probably thinking about those color swatches again.
“I have to tell you something,” Raven says hesitantly. “I can’t differentiate between egg-white, white, and off-white.”
I start laughing at her delayed honesty. “I know, baby. I asked you to choose between those three colors, and you circled the beige.”
Raven lets out a laugh, which still pulls at every single one of my heartstrings.
