Page 117 of Crazy In Love
And I liked it.
“I see those wheels turning, Chadwick. Go to sleep.”
I turned and winked at her before raising my arms and clapping my hands together twice to signal the lights to turn off.
Emilia broke out in a fit of giggles beside me just as the room went dark.
“Did you just clap your lights off?” She rolled on her side to face me, and I moved closer to her.
I craved her warmth in a way I couldn’t wrap my head around.
“I did. It’s a fabulous invention.”
Her hand moved to my face, her fingers fluttering along the edge of my jaw, and my breathing slowed.
“Did you go to the cemetery today?” she whispered.
“Yes. We normally stay longer, but with it snowing so hard, we just paid our respects and left.”
“She must be so proud of you and the man that you’ve grown into,” she said, her words startling me.
“Well, she’s not here, so I highly doubt that.”
“She’s looking down on you, Bridger. And I bet she’s smiling so big. Look at all you’ve accomplished. You’ve built this successful software company, you’ve traveled the world, and you love your family fiercely.”
I was quiet as I processed her words. “She lost her life bringing me into the world. I was a bad idea before I even entered the world.”
“That’s a horrible thing to say about the guy I just agreed to date,” she said, her words laced with humor. “Did you know three hundred thousand women die a year from either pregnancy or childbirth? Do you really think innocent babies are to blame?”
She’d clearly done her research and was determined to make her point.
“Of course not.”
“Oh, so it’s only you who should be held responsible?”
“Obviously I had no control over what happened. But at the end of the day, my birth caused a lot of pain to a lot of people. That’s a fact, angel.”
Her leg slipped between mine, and I ran my fingers through her long, silky hair.
“Your father was an addict. He made a choice, and there were consequences to that choice. And you made a choice to do big, amazing things with your life, and I am just one of many who are grateful for your birth, Bridger.”
Her words were a salve to my damaged soul.
“I told you, I prefer you to call me ‘lover boy,’” I said, trying to lighten the moment.
“I would have guessed you to frown upon a silly nickname.”
“Normally I do,” I admitted.
“But this one doesn’t bother you?” she chuckled.
“Everything is different with you.”
Her head settled beneath my chin, her cheek against my chest.
“I remember the first time I was impressed by you,” she said, her voice low and soft.
I didn’t speak, I just waited.
