Page 82 of Kingdom of Flames & Flowers
“I see,” I said slowly. “I … see.”
I was the real idiot here, wasn’t I? How could I think anyone from the noble Seat would care about me, or view me as an equal? I was such an idiot.… They only wanted me to breed new princes and kings. I was a nameless body; an accessory just like the king to be controlled and put on display to hide the festering rot underneath. That I knew about both of them and the dragons was only a nice bonus.
And now my mother is here. And my long-lost brother. And Ell … and whoever the hell else the queen had gathered. They were the carrots that the queen’s giant stick dangled over me, easily snapped and broken if I stepped a single toe out of line.
“Please leave,” I said quietly, trying not to shake with rage. “And don’t come back unless I call for you. I need …” I pulled myself together. “I need some time.”
Zariah’s hands twitched like he physically ached to touch me, but he drew back, respecting my wishes.
“Fine,” he grit out, clearly unhappy about it. “I will return when you are … more yourself.”
Before I could answer, he strode out the door, leaving it wide open.
And me, all alone.
“ ‘More myself,’asshole.”
I slumped down on the couch, staring at the far wall. It was clear no one in this damn palace would give me the answers I craved because they wouldn’t, or couldn’t. The archive’s records were incomplete, and even if they somehow held the nasty truth within their dusty pages, I wouldn’t be able to read it.
And I didn’t have months to wait while I taught myself.
The king’s words rang in my ears, churning my stomach as fear that nothing he did or I did would ever make a difference. Hyacinth’s cries rang in my ears, bringing a blush of shame to my cheeks that I’d been so worried about the bigger picture that I’d forgotten to take care of those right in front of me.
I had nothing to lose, did I?
I stood, shucking off my dress and fancy clothes, letting the dagger hidden in my chest fall to the ground. When I couldn’t reach the buttons or undo the latch on the back, I simply ripped it off. My only regret was ruining Haza’s handiwork.
I wasn’t running away. I was simply going to check on something. I’d come right back as soon as my questions were answered.
I stormed to my wardrobe in my room, the other two beds still conspicuously neat and absent. The fighting leathers from my ‘talent’ had been meticulously cleaned and hung up. I pulled them on, grabbing the new leather boots and lacing them. I slammed my dagger into the sheath at my side.
Racing to the balcony, I peered over the edge. It was a sheer drop to the bottom, but if I could get down halfway, there was a thin rock ledge I could probably skirt the rest of the way down on if I was careful.
I tore up my dress into strips, uncaring of the damage. It held no good memories for me. Then I took all the blankets from Azalea and Leilani’s bed, and did the same. The result was quite long. Tying the scraps together into a makeshift rope, I secured the end to my railing and threw the rest over.
Silently, it fell into the night. At least the moon was full, providing something with which to see. With a smile, I watched as the rope fell far past the rock ledge. This should be simple, assuming I didn’t slip and fall to my death.
Breathing out, I put one leg over the balcony, grasped the fabric in my hands, and pushed off.
ChapterTwenty-Three
The silky sheets were hard to grasp, and I slid far too fast as I desperately grabbed at them to stop my fall. I twisted the fabric around my wrist and finally stopped, my arm shaking to support my weight.
Perhaps this hadn’t been such a great idea.
Just don’t look down.
Nothing for it now, I had to continue. I reached down by my knees and wrapped my free wrist around that fabric, then slowly unbundled my first wrist. I dropped two feet, but no further. My heart pounded out of my chest and sweat snaked down my back, but I’d found a workable solution.
Bit by bit, little fall by little fall, I descended. I refused to look down and simply kept moving with my mind on my goal. Eventually, my feet touched a lip in the rock, finding purchase.
The ledge!
It was wider than it looked from way above, allowing both of my feet to comfortably stand on it. Using the sheet to anchor myself, I leaned far back and saw the ledge wrapped around the side of the cliff, disappearing around a corner. Intrigued, I carefully shuffled along the edge, hanging onto the sheet for extra balance as long as I had slack.
Around the corner, the ledge widened to a proper path, and my sheet and dress rope was taunt as it reached its full length. Reluctant to let it go completely, I found a sharp, jagged rock and jammed it into the dirt at my feet; it was just deep enough to hold the end of the rope in place.
Perfect.
