Page 70 of The Vet from Snowy River
‘Honey, why would I need to learn how to cook? There’s a perfectly good pizza joint twenty feet from my front door. No, in searching through public legislation.’
‘Oh.’
‘I want to get a copy of any likely laws, council or state or federal, that we need to comply with. And put a protocol in place so if any more of this nonsense comes our way we can prove we’re acting like responsible business owners. We don’t need this bullshit in our lives, so we want to be proactive about it.’
She shook her head. ‘I can’t help you.’
The tidy, busy enclave of Ironbark Station opened out on the grassy plain ahead of them, and Vera made a clicking noise to spur Calypso ahead of him down the trail. He watched her go and wondered why the day seemed a little less bright.
‘Can’t? Or won’t?’ he muttered.
His horse gave a soft little whinny, then headed down the path in Vera’s wake.
CHAPTER
21
She had to get away. Being near Josh, especially now with that kiss scalding her brain so badly she could barely string two thoughts together, just reminded her how weak she was. How foolish.
All he’d had to do was lower his voice and get all warm and schmoozy, and she’d melted into a puddle of want.
She knew better. When her feelings were involved, she lost her objectivity. Her judgement. She couldn’t make that mistake again.
She’d resolved to tell him why she was a bad bet, but then she’d let pretty views and sun-warmed man smell override her prudence. And now here she was, acting like a monster, saying no to a simple request for help hunting through dusty filing cabinets and online databases.
Had Josh sent her a bill for helping with the cat? No. He hadn’t asked for one cent. And she’d repaid him by turning her back and trotting off into the distance like a teenager enjoying a sulkfest.
She had to stop. Literally. As in pull on the straps, or whatever the hell these leather things in her hands were called, and bring Calypso to a halt.
And she had to stop pretending she could live a normal life and go on horsey dates in grassy valleys with kind-eyed hot vets.
She couldn’t. She had a court case hanging over her head like a vat of boiling oil, and she couldn’t risk that oil tipping down and scarring anyone but herself.
Café, aunt, solitude … they were her goals and it was time she remembered them. She’d apologise for being a cow. She’d go home. She could spend the afternoon planning stuff shecoulddo without screwing up: maybe a fun brunch menu, or a new lamb shank potpie. It would take her mind off the things she couldn’t do, like start a relationship. Help people. Spend one damn day without this awful weight ofshameon her heart.
Calypso finally seemed to get the hint that she wanted her to stop moving and ducked her head down to nibble on the long grass by the side of the trail.
Vera twisted in her saddle and practised what she had to say while she waited for Josh to catch up.Oh, Josh, just in case you were wondering why I rode off like a crazy woman, here’s a few reasons: the last man I kissed betrayed me and I can’t put it behind me, because the betrayal led to a court case and I may end up going to prison and I can barely acknowledge that thought to myself, let alone to anyone else.
Was that too much all in one go? Because that wasn’t even the half of it.Oh, Josh, also, my state of mind is pretty dire and I could fall at any moment down into the black pit of not-coping. My aunt’s health failed because I chose a terrible aged care home for her, and then I became a vigilante and failed.
There were also mundane worries, like if she went to prison, what would happen to the lease she’d signed on the café premises. Her loan. And the new concern she had no room for but which had piled up anyway: who would feed one cranky grey cat and her umpteen kittens if she was in an orange jumpsuit in a cement building with bars on the windows and despair in the air?
She looked back up the trail. Whatever she was going to say, she’d better work it out fast, because Josh and his horse appeared through the trees, sunlight flickering over them. He had sprigs of lavender blooms tucked into his shirt pocket, and another posy of them in his hand, but his face was shadowed by the deep brim of his hat.
Heaven only knew what he was thinking.
She waited until he’d brought his horse abreast with her in the shade of an ancient grass tree.
‘Josh. I’m sorry about before.’
A dimple flickered on his cheek. ‘Which is the bit you’re sorry about?’
She pulled a lock of Calypso’s mane through her fingertips. ‘Getting huffy when you asked me for help.’
‘You want to tell me why you got huffy?’
‘I’m going to try. It’s not easy.’
