Page 52 of Sawyer
“See, it works.”I take the bottle from him and place it on his nightstand, tucking him in.My nights now look very fucking different.If anyone had told me that I would be tucking a toddler into bed instead of having a whiskey at the Polo Bar, I would have told them they were crazy.
Yet here I am.
“Night, buddy.See you in the morning.”I ruffle his hair before walking out of the room.Stepping carefully down the hall, I see Kevin also in his room, lying in bed reading.
“What are you reading?”I lean on his doorway, hearing Annabelle clattering in the kitchen, putting away the leftovers from dinner.
“Just a book on baseball.”He puts it down, looking at me.
“Why am I not surprised…” I grin at him.There’s only been one other kid I know who loves baseball as much as Kevin, and that was me.
“Sawyer, can I ask you something?”He sits up, suddenly serious, so I tentatively take a few steps into his room.
“Sure, anything.”
“Are you Ma’s boyfriend?”
I bite the inside of my cheek so I don’t chuckle.I want him to know I take his questions seriously.
“Would that be okay with you if I was?”I turn the question back to him.Annabelle and I haven’t talked about exclusivity, but I sure as hell am not spending time with anyone else, and I know she isn’t either.
“Yeah… I mean, you make her happy.She smiles more when you’re here, and she’s real pretty when she smiles.”
I swallow roughly, nodding in understanding.It’s a beautiful thing how much he loves his mom.
“Yeah, she sure is.”We had a great weekend all together.This whole thing is so domesticated and should feel completely foreign to me, yet it doesn’t.It feels right.“I miss her and you boys when I’m not here,” I tell him honestly.
“She misses you too,” he admits, and I nod again, knowing the connectedness we’re all starting to feel is becoming very real.
I clear my throat.“Okay.Must be lights out soon.Don’t stay up too late.”
He gives me a small smile and goes back to his book, and I slowly retreat, walking down the hall to the kitchen, where I find his mom just finished cleaning up.
“You need some help?”
She turns, looking at me with her wide smile, the one that temporarily disarms me every time.
“No, all done.Thanks for checking on the boys.Do you want to go sit on the porch?It’s a nice night.”As she steps closer, I don’t hesitate to grab her hand.
“Lead the way, Mama.”We walk out to the front, keeping the door ajar, and sit on her patio swing.We relax in silence for a little bit.This swing is starting to feel like our own private time once the boys go to bed.We’ve sat out here almost every night whenever I’m here.My balcony at my penthouse in the city doesn’t have the same peaceful effect.I know.I’ve tried it.
“Kevin asked me if I was your boyfriend.”
She looks up at me in horror, and I laugh.“What did you say?”
“I asked if he would be okay with that, and he said he would be.”
Her lips turn into a small smile, her head resting on my shoulder.
Pressing a kiss to her head, I tell her, “Give me your feet.”
She leans over and shuffles a little, bringing her feet to my lap, and I squeeze the arches.
“That feels so good…” she moans, her head falling back, and I grin as I look up to the night sky.
“I know we haven’t talked too much about what we are or what we’re doing…” I look back at her and find her watching me.It’s so quiet out here, I can hear her breathing.The only other noises are the nearby crickets.
“Well, if you’re offering free foot massages, then I’ll be anything that you want me to be.”
