Page 17 of The Hellcat Barbies: Saskia
He had me there, so, I just shut the fuck up.
When we turned onto Mrs. Jean's street, I thought he’d been playing a sick game until he parked in the neighbor's yard. I didn’t know what to say or how to say it, so I went with the flow and got out when he opened my door. With my eyes fixed on Mrs. Jean’s front door, I sighed and followed behind Yak. I wasn’t in the mood to meet family today, but I’d been living several states away with this man’s baby and his car, or whatever, so I just had to go along. I’d just gotten my body back and my breathing was under control after months of being short of breath. I wasn’t looking for a fight, an argument, or a run. At this point, it was what it was. As long as I could get to my baby at the end of the day, I was good. I’d been through hell and back and was still standing, so nothing could break me. I was completely mentally and physically exhausted.
The smell of soul food made my stomach rumble as Yak took his key out of the door and stepped inside. I followed closely behind him, eager to finish this meeting so I could drag him across the yard to meet his kid. He’d probably be mad when he found out his child had been just a few steps away from his granny. But how the hell was I supposed to know that? I just dropped my kid off at the babysitter's and then went to work. I wasn’t out knocking on doors asking if people were kin to my baby, especially not way in Diamond Cove.If my life hadn’t been such a whirlwind, I might think I was having one of my infamous pregnancy dreams, so vivid it felt real.
The modern yet cozy two-story home felt welcoming from the first moment I entered, but my nerves were too bad to appreciate anything around me.
“Granny! Where you at beautiful?”
“In the kitchen!”
Holding his hand out behind him, I placed my hand in his as he pulled me through the house.
When we got to the kitchen. Two older ladies were standing around the island, and I instantly stopped and snatched my hand back.
“Sassy?” Mrs. Jean’s brows crumbled.
“Well, it's bout damn time you came.” The lady chuckled.
Yak’s shoulders tensed as he looked from Mrs. Jean to the woman I assumed was his grandma, holding a baby—our baby.
“I told you I had to tell you something, Zodi,” she grinned.
Turning his neck to face me, I licked my dry lips.
“Yak. Meet our son, Steele.”
Chapter Five
SOMETHING BLUE
Zodiac “Yak” Valor
Steele. His name should have been Melt because the hardened heart in my chest instantly turned into pure lava. I was always amazed when I was around my little cousins, especially because they looked so much like their father. Just little Hunters running amuck, driving their mama crazy. It tripped me out every time they were around. Now, seeing my own fucking son—holding my own fucking son, who had everything of mine—broke me and built me up again.
He was so damn tiny. His curly head rested in my palm while the rest of his body stretched down my forearm. Given his long legs, I could tell he was going to take after my height. Just like it had with my little cousins, the family gene had shown up in Steele. His blonde hair was more sandy—not quite golden, but that’s how mine had looked as a baby. By the time he was three, his hair and eyebrows would brighten. Watching him sleep in my arms, with only a diaper on, because after his mom bathed him I took him right out of her arms, my eyes misted. I probably cried more than I ever had in my life.
There was no way for me to tell how long I had been in this room, admiring him. I knew it had to have been hours becauseSaskia had brought a bottle for me to feed him and had changed him. He’d slept through the feeding and the changing. I wanted to stare into my boy’s eyes, but he was sleeping too peacefully. When I walked into my granny’s kitchen and saw her holding him, I almost fell to my knees. I couldn’t even be mad at her. She’d been trying to get me to North Carolina for the past few months, and I’d kept putting it off. The mob kept a nigga busy as hell, but I should have made the time. Had I come here when Granny asked, I would have met my son sooner. That’s on me.
Saskia had been as quiet as a mouse on the other side of the door. She was scared and tense, but she had no reason to be. We’d had sex a year ago, even though she claimed she didn’t remember, and she ended up with a beautiful child. She had no way to contact me and was dealing with her own problems. I wasn’t about to make her feel worse than I’m sure she already did about everything. I was more upset that she had to go through this alone, even though she assured me on the way to her house that her friend had been there every step of the way.But it shouldn’t have been her friend. It should have been me. Back rubs, foot rubs, massages, doctor’s appointments, craving runs, labor and delivery—all that shit should have been me. That’s what I was most upset about.
Placing a kiss on my son's nose and then his forehead, I walked him to the gray crib she had against the wall. Saskia had done a damn good job, especially considering she handled all of this by herself. Her townhouse was clean, well-decorated, and smelled good. Our son’s room was decorated in an industrial theme, and even though she did a great job, I was already picturing how I would steal her idea but have a professional go all out for his nursery back in Jagoda Bay.
Going to the black dresser, I pulled out one of the neatly folded nighties and returned to the crib. It took me forever to get him inside without waking him. I added the matching hat thatwas slightly too big, kissed him again, and then turned off his light.
I’d had a lot of sex and never gotten a woman pregnant. I told myself that the mother of my children would be the love of my life—my wife. God took his big ass sandal off and slapped me in the back of the head because not only had I gotten a woman pregnant, but one who had no interest in being anyone’s wife.
It didn't take me long to find Saskia. All I did was follow the sniffles, and it led me to her bedroom. Even with tired, red-rimmed eyes and a slightly round face—probably because of her lingering pregnancy weight that I loved—she was still so fucking beautiful.I could tell she’d showered because she was still wearing the shower cap and dressed in a matching pajama short set that had little hellcat cars all over it. It caused me to fucking chuckle, especially since the cars were different shades of pink.
She squinted at me, but her tears kept coming. Like the rest of her home, her bedroom was fully furnished. The white queen-sized bed was made up with a pink duvet. She had pink accents throughout her room, which was fitting, but just like the nursery and the rest of the house, it was decorated just enough but not too much. For some reason, I had the feeling that Saskia hadn’t gone all out on the décor just in case she had to run again. It fucked me up that she thought she wasn’t safe, especially from me.
“Sass,” I walked further into her room, stopping at the side of her bed. She looked up at me, still hugging her knees, and that shit pulled at my damn heartstrings.
“Stop crying, baby.”
Brushing my thumb across her cheek and then the other, her tears kept falling, and I continued thumbing them away.
“You too fucking pretty to be crying. Everything gone be straight.”
