Page 20 of The App Trap
It was much worse:
“I really enjoyed last night.”
No, not that bit.
“Look, I really like you and I was honest with you last night, when I said I didn’t want anything serious, but I feel I should tell you something else. I’ve got a third date with someone next week,” said Harry, wincing into himself.
“Ah, well… that’s… oh,” I stumbled out.
Harry looked as crestfallen as I felt.
“The worst thing is, I really like you, but here’s the thing…”
I nodded to urge him on.
“It’s just, I always see you online and I kind of get the impression that I’m probably not the only date you had lined up either?”
Damn him for being spot on. But surely that didn’t matter now that we’d met each other? Or did it? The fact I had to think about it meant that it just might.
“So, I’m thinking that maybe we should just chalk last night up as a fun one and go about our business,” he continued.
“Yeah, okay. Look, I guess if fate wants to put us together again, it’ll do its damnedest, eh?”
He reached out to touch my arm.
“Totally. I’ve got a couple of months left on my subscription, anyway. It’d be a shame to waste it,” replied Harry.
I directed a quizzical look towards his face. Now, us Brits like to get value for money, and that goes double for dating apps. Triple, even.
However, I’d never really experienced an attitude anything like this before. The act of dating never used to cost anything before I discovered the apps, so I was never concerned with getting value for money.
I thought about it. Dates were the product that the dating apps were selling you. You didn’t want to spend £30to unlock all the features only to find your soul mate after one day. What a waste of cash that would be, eh?
Wow. So, this was how these online potential love interestsreallybehave?
“I was joking about that last bit, by the way,” he added. “Third date, remember? I’m not acompletefloosy.”
Ah, maybe not.
Harry went on to tell me he had been online dating for a few years already, and had gone and got himself a bit addicted, the silly sausage. It seemed to me that he had just wanted to take full advantage of the extensive menu that was being fired at him from all angles––and why not, eh?
This was the first moment when I thought that finding a mate online could actually start to form a real addiction. So far in my life, I hadn't developed an addiction for anything.
I heard that addiction was hereditary, and it just so happened that Mum was a recovering alcoholic, fifteen years dry. If it wasn’t going to be drinking, then maybe dating would be my addiction?
Well, at least it’s not one of the deadly ones, I suppose. Or is it?
I shook myself out of that train of thought. No. I wasn't going to get myself addicted to all this stuff. I was going to find a soul mate, and make my mother proud. If not Harry, then someone else. After all, an actual relationship was everything that I had always wanted. I think it was what we all wanted, deep down—wasn’t it? Or at least what we’re all programmed to want.
From an early age, we were led to believe that our soul mate was out there, and we spent our entire lives searching for them. Whether we admitted it or not, we were always on thescout.
The white noise of thousands of dating profiles was actually becoming more of an obstacle than an aid to the cause. I’d gone into this with the sole intention of finding something I’d never experienced before––that elusive feeling of true love.
Harry was dressed and ready to summon his Uber XL. With his hair tousled but still somehow magnificent-looking, I couldn’t believe that I was about to let this man walk out of my life.
When we were downstairs, he paid the £180 hotel bill without so much as a flinch, and we stumbled through the lobby to the awaiting cold, fresh air outside. It was niggling me so much that I’d found someone so perfect who actually seemed to like me, yet was too stubborn to take things any further. But at the same time, I thought ‘screw it’ and could feel myself voluntarily drifting towards the dark side of the dating app.
“Friends?” said Harry, offering me a pinky.
