Page 76 of Once Upon A Royal Christmas
You can’t break up with someone who was never really yours to begin with.
“Everything we’ve done together this week was part of a PR stunt, as pretend as my royal credentials,” she said.
A muscle in Nick’s jaw ticked—the one that Gracie had gotten an eyeful of back when they truly disliked each other. She hadn’t seen it in days.
“Not for me,” he said. “Not for a long, long while. Maybe not ever.”
This was excruciating. She’d never wanted to believe anyone more in her entire life.
How could she trust that any of this was real? She’d been pretending for so many years that she wasn’t sure she really knew how to stop.
And even if she could, it still wouldn’t solve the problem—she was in love with him. The longer she stuck around and played at being princess with him, the harder it would be to walk away. If she didn’t tell him goodbye now, she’d never be able to do it without breaking apart.
She was a snow princess frozen in time, and when ice was under pressure, it only did one thing. Shatter.
“Nick, you don’t really want to be with me. You don’t. You care too much about what people think of you to make this real between us. And that’s okay. You care because you have to. It’s not just your job. It’s your birthright, and I don’t want to mess that up,” she said, because apparently if her heart was going to splinter into pieces, she was going to break his too.
What am I doing?
“That wouldn’t happen,” Nick said through gritted teeth, and Gracie had to give him credit. She was being unfair, and she knew it. And he was still standing there, still trying to help her believe they were real. “You’re not going to mess up. You’ve done so well dealing with the public so far. Much better than I expected. Everyone adores you.”
He meant it as a compliment, but Gracie couldn’t quite grasp hold of it. She was only human. Eventually, she’d make a mistake. Everyone did. What happened when the public no longer adored her? Would Nick’s feelings about her change too?
She wanted unconditional love, not to be put on a pedestal. Not even by a prince.
Then, as if he could read her mind, Nick said, “I’m not him, Gracie. I’m not Philip. I’m not going to let you struggle all on your own, and I’m not going to blame you if something goes wrong. We’re a team. You can trust me, Princess.”
Tears pricked the backs of her eyes. She really wished he wouldn’t call her that. Not now. “I’m not a princess, Nick, and I never will be. I’m just a girl who’s really good at playing make-believe.”
Then she closed the space between them, pressed a tender kiss to his cheek, and bid Prince Charming and his fairy tale life farewell.
“Happy Christmas Eve!” Emilie swung the door open to Nick’s quarters the following morning and barged inside, still wearing the footie pajamas she favored during the holidays—red fleece, with flying reindeer zipping all over them.
Nick didn’t bother lifting his head from his pillow. There wasn’t an ounce of holiday spirit remaining in his body. Nor his soul. It was going to take a true Christmas miracle just to get him through the festivities later tonight in one piece.
“What’s going on in here? You never sleep in.” Emilie strolled toward the bed and plopped right down.
Nick was going to have to invest in a lock for his door. With any luck, there’d be one under the Christmas tree tomorrow morning, right next to the big box of dog treats that Jaron always bought for Mittens.
At least his dog was still curled against his side, making little snuffling noises in his sleep. Nick supposed this was why Cavaliers were so often called “comforter spaniels.” They stuck right by you, both physically and emotionally, when you needed them most.
No sooner had Nick processed that idea than Mittens cracked his eyes open, let out a squeaky dog yawn, and shimmied toward Emilie. She ran her fingertips over his copper-colored ears, and he rolled onto his back and let out an obnoxious sigh.
Consider yourself comforted, Nick thought wryly. The dog had moved on.
Nick picked up one of the numerous pillows on his bed and plopped it over his face.
Emilie nudged his leg with her foot. “Seriously, what’s with you? You’re being all broody again.”
“How can you tell? I’m not even awake yet,” he said into the pillow.
Emilie snatched the pillow off him and tossed it toward the foot of the bed. Nick squinted against the ray of morning light drifting through the crack in the draperies.
“That’s exactly how I can tell. You haven’t slept this late in…well…ever. It’s almost nine. You’ve been bouncing out of bed every morning, eager to get on with the Christmas tour. It’s been rather annoying.” Emilie sighed. “But not as annoying as this abominable act you’ve got going on. I thought you were finished with all of that. I can see the knot in your jaw from here.”
Nick said nothing, but noted that his jaw was, in fact, tense.
“I kind of thought you’d want to spend the day with Gracie before her performance tonight. She’s leaving tomorrow, isn’t she?” Emilie stretched her legs out long and wiggled her toes.
