Page 113 of Twisted (Never After)
Julian doesn’t waste any time, taking me to the estate himself, and when we reach my father’s bedroom door, Shaina is there, looking at us with tears in her beautiful big brown eyes.
Emotion burns through my chest, a heavy ache settling in deep. I open my mouth to speak, to maybe ask how he is or what I can do, but my breathing stutters the moment I do, grief welling up like a tidal wave.
Julian’s arm wraps around my waist and pulls me into his side, giving me silent support while he presses kisses to my temple.
“He’s asleep,” Shaina says without me asking.
“Will he wake up?” I force out.
She shakes her head softly.
My heart splits.
She walks toward me, reaching out and grasping my hand in hers. “But he can hear you. And I know he’s been holding on until you could make it back.”
A tear drips down my face, my throat so swollen I can hardly breathe. I nod, spinning around to look at Julian.
He cups my cheeks, wiping away the tears before they can hit my chin.
“I don’t know how to do this,” I whisper, my voice cracking.
Sighing, he presses a kiss to my forehead before leaning away and staring directly into my eyes.
“There’s nothing for you to do, amore mio,” he soothes. “Just walk in there, hold his hand one last time, and say goodbye.”
My face screws up as tears fall without me being able to stop them, my breaths stuttering from the pain that’s shredding my chest in two.
I nod, backing away from my husband, and I walk toward my father instead.
One last time.
Chapter38
Yasmin
My father passed away with me still in the room.
It took hours, but the second I told him it was okay for him to let go, he did.
I spend the rest of the night crying, deep, guttural sobs that tear up my soul and make me feel like I’ll never be whole again.
And honestly, I don’t think Iwillbe. Losing a parent is like losing a limb. There’s a part of me that will always be missing now that he’s gone, an ache that will never be filled. I loved my father with everything that I am. I gave up my own dreams and ambitions just to make sure he was happy, looked forward to every summer I’d come home, just to be able to breathe the same air.
He was my everything.
And it wasn’t until he faced his own mortality that he became the man he truly wanted to be, and somehow, even though I won’t get to experience the relationship that could have been with that version of him, I’ll have to find peace in the fact that at leasthemade peace with himself.
And now he can go be with his love, my mother.
But none of that makes it hurt any less, because he’s still nothere.
Julian didn’t leave my side all night. And I know that even if he doesn’t say it out loud, he’s hurting too.
He loved my father, regardless of whether he’ll admit it.
And when he tries to stay home with me the next morning, I push him out the door, telling him that he needs to go on with life like things are normal. I need him to be normal, because if he isn’t, then my whole world will fall apart. I still haven’t told him about the lamp, but I will. Tonight when he gets home.
I’m fortunate enough to have had time to prepare for my baba’s death, but it doesn’t make the loss any less overwhelming.
