Page 8 of Undesirable
“You had demon poison lingering in your blood. I’m the only one who can truly break that curse, since it’s my creation. You’ve been here before.”
Tam didn’t respond to the accusation. They both knew the only way to get demon sickness was through physical contact with a demon. The only way Tam’s had run so deeply… He had been in Lucifer’s torture chambers. How had that happened? He had never been more invested.
Tam’s gaze was locked on Brownie. “What’s that? It looks like a dog, but it’s too big.”
“It’s a hellhound.”
A bright smile snapped his way. “No way! He’s too cute.”
Lucifer fought a smile. He was brave as fuck. “I promise you he is. What did you think hellhounds looked like?”
Tam spread his arms wide. “Huge and bloody. Monsters, I guess. He’s adorable. Can I pet him?”
Lucifer cocked his head to one side and studied Tam. A growing suspicion took hold. “You have my permission. His name is Brownie.”
Tam flashed him a smile as he dropped to his knees and gave Brownie all the love—much to Brownie’s heavenly delight.
“Brownie? You named a hellhound Brownie? I mean, it fits, but doesn’t he get teased by all the other dogs?”
Lucifer shook his head. This had been the oddest day. “I’m not fooled, you know? You touch things so you can take their form later.”
Tam kept his gaze locked on Brownie. Lucifer knew he was right. That was how shifters worked. They could change into anything their heart desired, but they had to have touched the object first. Tam likely pulled this trick all the time, using the ruse of innocence to get his way. Truthfully,he was fully aware of the extent of his power and Lucifer felt the darkness he hid. Lucifer understood why he pretended. He, too, possessed deceptive beauty. It was a weapon and a curse.
“I touch everything because I love animals. They have a purity no other creature can claim.” His gaze met Lucifer’s. He looked like a different person. Dangerous. “But yes, I also touch everything because I’ll never be a victim again.”
There it was—like looking in a mirror.
“How can I help you, Tam?”
Tam gave Brownie a final pat and stood. “I have a message from Celeste.”
Instant rage nearly took him out. He hadn’t heard a fucking word from his sister in so long, he couldn’t recall. Now, here was this kid. “Go on.” Even Lucifer heard the beast inside him trying to break free.
“Your mate is currently trying every method possible to kill himself so he can find a way into Hell. He loves you. Celeste says to tell you to, and I’m quoting here, ‘stop being a weak-ass bitch and get your man.’ She doesn’t pair souls out of boredom. It’s her job. Riku is truly yours. This isn’t some way to fuck you up or anything. He’s a gift. If you don’t want him, then say so. She’ll return Riku to the heavens and set you free.”
“How will that set me free? If he’s my other half, then that can’t be undone. We’ll both still be only one half of a whole. She’s the fucking expert. All therest of us are just fucking guessing how this shit works.”
Tam shrugged. “I’m just the messenger. It’s all too complicated for me, but I can tell you this. I go to see my grandmother all the time and I have a mate. He’s sweet and kind and funny.” Tam twisted from side to side, smiling like he had completely lost the plot. He finally stopped and held Lucifer’s stare. “When I’m with Celeste, the way I feel isn’t muted. I know they say I should feel less there, but I don’t. There’s never a time when I can tolerate the separation. My guess is, even if she takes Riku to heaven, you’ll both still suffer. There’s no such thing as freedom without your mate. Whatever has you staying away, it can’t be as bad as the pain of being apart. I can’t imagine… or maybe I can, and that’s why I can’t stop talking.” He pressed his lips together, as if physically forcing himself to stop.
“Riku doesn’t want me.” The words were like hot coals in his throat. “This isn’t me being a weak-ass bitch. He doesn’t want me.”
Tam’s hands rose and fell. “I mean, obviously, he does. Why else would he try to come here?” Tam looked thoughtful. “But I have no idea why he thinks he has to die to get here. Demons and you and me and probably hellhounds and birds.” He stared into space again as if lost in his head. Finally, he snapped back to reality. “Why are there so many birds here? It’s really out of control.” He waved his arms. “My point is that… no, really, I can’t take it. Why are there so many birds?”
“They’re my spies,” he answered absently.
While Tam had obviously totally forgotten his point, Lucifer got it. Creatures crossed the veil unharmed all the time. Riku didn’t need to die. Why was he trying to die? Maybe his actions had nothing to do with Lucifer. It was more likely he tried to get out of their mating. Lucifer had claimed him and ruined his life. Only death would set him free. Pain bloomed in his chest. This had nothing to do with him. Riku wouldn’t come here. He had been given all the chances and hadn’t taken them. They were done. He neededto accept that.
Tam sighed. “I see it’s up to me. Sheesh. I have a life too, you know. My mate is waiting for me. He shouldn’t have to sit on the back burner over something so stupid. Ugh.”
Tam turned back into a fox and disappeared inside Lucifer’s bedroom as quickly as he had appeared, leaving Lucifer more confused than before he came. It seemed he had a nephew, though. That was interesting. He had to think about anything other than Riku trying to die. Fuck him. If he wanted to be freed that badly, let him suffer. Lucifer had fucking tried. He was done with that bullshit. It was Riku’s turn to burn.
Chapter Four
Theyhadtriedpoison,an overdose of anesthesia, medical suffocation, and a few things Frost flat out refused to take part in. Nothing worked. He didn’t even feel sick. It was pointless. Riku just couldn’t die. Yuri was beyond horrified at first. After the third failed attempt, he had turned morbidly fascinated, just as Frost had done. They stared at him with equal amounts of awe and pity.
“What if you turned into a cobra and a Werebear ate you?”
Frost shook his head at Yuri’s suggestion. “The bear would probably die.”
