Page 42 of The Sapphire Child
Lydia’s expression crumpled at once. ‘I can’t believe you’d defend this treacherous girl instead of your own mother,’ she sobbed. ‘Can’t you see how they’ve all been keeping secrets from you?’
Andrew’s look faltered. ‘Stella? You knew they weren’t properly married?’
‘Only since coming to Ebbsmouth.’ She tried to explain. ‘Tibby...’
‘Auntie Tibby knows? Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘I hoped it would never come out,’ Stella said with a despairing look.
Lydia reached for Andrew. ‘She can’t be trusted – none of them can; only me. I’m the only one who truly cares about you.’
He shook her off. ‘Why wouldn’t you divorce Dad?’ he accused.
Lydia’s head drooped. She crumpled onto the sofa. ‘Because I still love him!’
Stella stared at her in disgust. How could she profess love for a man she had just said such cruel and wicked things about? She was beneath contempt.
For a moment, Andrew looked undecided too. His hand hovered over her shoulder. Then abruptly, he turned and strode from the room. Stella followed him out.
He was too fast for her, taking the stairs two at a time. She chased after him. ‘Andrew, wait!’
He thundered up the corridor. As he reached his bedroom, he turned on her.
‘You knew and you never told me,’ he said, his look stormy.
Stella stopped short. ‘I’m sorry, Andrew. But your mother should never have said those horrible things about your father and Esmie – she’s had too much to drink.’
‘Don’t blame Mamma! At least she’s told me the truth.’
‘Only part of it. She’s the one to blame for denying your father a divorce and forcing him and Esmie into an impossible situation. What else could they have done?’
Andrew’s eyes glistened. ‘They could have been honest with me – and so could you. I put Gotley in the san’ with a broken cheekbone because of their lies.’
Stella swallowed. ‘I’m so sorry – I know it’s been a terrible shock – but when we get back to India, they’ll be able to explain—’
‘Stop it,’ he hissed. ‘I don’t want to hear any more. Just go, Stella!’
He threw open the door to his bedroom, rushed inside and slammed it shut behind him.
Stella stood there shaking. She put out a hand to knock – she wanted to comfort him – but hesitated. Nothing she said would make any difference while he was so distressed. She would try and make amends in the morning – and perhaps Lydia might wake up feeling a little contrite for having created such upset.
She leaned her head against the door in despair. Guilt overwhelmed her that she had added to Andrew’s misery by not being frank with him about what Tibby had told her. Didn’t he have a right to know? They were all covering up the truth to save him being hurt and humiliated, believing he was too young to cope with the situation. Yet all Andrew wanted was for them to be honest with him. She of all people should have known that.
Chapter 16
Stella got no sleep that night. The terrible row played in her head over and over. Lydia’s spiteful words had been relentless. In a few short minutes she had dismantled Andrew’s adoration of his father.‘Court-martialled...cowardly act... should have been shot... mental instability...’And then Lydia had confirmed George Gotley’s gossip that Esmie was not properly married to Tom. Andrew’s beloved Meemee – the woman he thought of as his stepmother – had been living a lie.
Stella lay tortured by thoughts of her own part in this. She would have to write to the Lomaxes and warn them of what had happened. Given how word travelled so quickly around British circles in India, it was surprising that they’d been able to keep up the pretence for so long. Was that why they’d chosen to live a more reclusive life in Kashmir rather than in the army town of Rawalpindi?
Tom’s mental well-being must also have been a factor when they opted for a quieter life in Gulmarg – a place that was cut off in winter. She knew that Esmie shielded him from the outside world to some extent. Stella was one of the few people who knew that Tom’s bouts of depression were caused not only by shell shock but also his grief over the deaths of his first wife and baby daughter. It made Stella realise that another reason why Esmie would risk theshame of living outside of marriage with Tom was so that she could nurse him and take care of him during the bad days.
Stella gave up trying to sleep. She switched on the light and fetched her writing case. She began writing a letter to Hugh, but soon gave up. How could she write to him of love and happiness when her feelings were in turmoil? All was now overshadowed by the awful confrontation with Lydia.
Instead, she pulled out a fresh piece of blue airmail paper and began to write to Esmie.
Stella overslept. She’d fallen asleep at dawn and now woke groggy and exhausted. Splashing water on her face and dressing hurriedly she went below. The clock in the kitchen showed it was already mid-morning. Cook had left out some oatcakes and honey for her breakfast and a note saying she had gone shopping. Unable to face more than a nibble of oatcake, she went looking for Andrew. Today, the Langleys were due to return to Durham and she knew he would want to spend his final hours with Noel, no matter what state of mind he was in.
Stella dreaded bumping into Lydia, so began by searching outside in the hope that the boys were playing in the garden. There was no sign of them and she noticed that Lydia’s car was gone. At least she could avoid seeing Andrew’s mother for a little longer. She returned inside and went upstairs to check if Andrew was still in the house. His bedroom door was wide open.
