Page 102 of The Sapphire Child
Below, someone went by singing a high-pitched melodious song in Urdu. The sky over the city was rose pink and the outline of palm trees and ethereal pillared buildings began to emerge. Over the cries of stevedores, he could hear the chatter of exotic birds. He felt a sudden unexpected surge of excitement – India was welcoming him back.
Chapter 38
The Raj-in-the-Hills, early February 1942
For the past few weeks, Stella and the Lomaxes had been marooned in the mountains. The snow in January had been so thick that for several days they had not even attempted to dig their way out. When Tom and Bijal eventually set out, the drifts of snow were chest-high in places.
Only Bijal and Karo had stayed on after December, both hardy Pathans used to the hardships of mountain winters and both discreet, neither passing comment on Stella’s pregnant state.
The news that they had gleaned from the temperamental radio was deeply worrying. Hong Kong had fallen to the Japanese in late December and by January they had overrun Borneo and most of Malaya. Now Singapore was under siege, with bombing raids being carried out in broad daylight. A few weeks ago, the idea of this British-held territory being surrendered to Japan had been unthinkable; now it seemed only a matter of time.
Stella had no idea if Hugh was still there or whether he had managed to escape. She had never replied to his explosive letter and didn’t know if he’d written again – no mail had been delivered since the end of December.
She had been cocooned in this icy, white world, content to hibernate from the dangers beyond it. She knew that her time was running out and she would have to face the world soon. Her thoughts about Hugh still see-sawed from day to day. One moment she clung to the hope that he would make good his promise to marry her and give their baby a name; the next she was filled with anger that he was a married man who had deceived her and left her pregnant.
Esmie was right when she’d said that Hugh might never divorce his wife – and even if he eventually did, it didn’t help her in the here and now. Did she have the courage to brazen out her situation as an unmarried mother in the hopes that he might one day stand by her and their child?
Yet it distressed her to think Hugh might still be in Singapore and in danger. No matter what he had done, he was the father of the child she was carrying and she still cared for his safety. The thought of him being taken prisoner – or worse – seized her with panic.
Only a month away from giving birth, her belly and breasts were large, though the rest of her body was trim. Esmie had made sure that she kept healthy with indoor exercises, simple food and plenty of rest.
The Lomaxes had been like doting parents, cossetting her and keeping her occupied. With Tom she had learnt to draw flowers and found that she could be absorbed for hours – time in which she stopped dwelling on her situation. With Esmie and Karo, she sat on the floor propped up by cushions and stitched patterns of birds and flowers onto a blanket for the baby.
By the middle of February, when a slight thaw began, Tom made plans to go into Srinagar.
‘I can’t bear this waiting,’ he said. ‘I need to find out what’s happening and where Andrew is.’
Tom was the epitome of a loving father. No matter that Andrew was now grown up, Tom still worried about him and loved him with the same fierce intensity that he had when he was a boy.
The night before Tom set off to trek into town, Stella lay sleepless and uncomfortable, her hands resting on her large belly. She’d had sharp twinges on a couple of occasions that Esmie had reassured her were normal in the late stages of pregnancy.
With Esmie – an experienced nurse – and Karo there to help her through the birth, Stella didn’t fear it. But thinking of her life once the baby was born kept her troubled and awake. Slowly in her mind a plan began to form.
She hardly slept more than an hour or two. When she heard the Lomaxes stirring, she got up, wrapped a blanket round her and went to join them.
‘You didn’t have to get up to see Tom off,’ Esmie said with a fond smile.
‘No,’ Tom agreed. ‘Go back to bed and keep warm.’
Stella stood facing them, her heart pounding. She screwed up courage to say what she’d decided in the night.
‘I want to ask you something,’ she began. ‘A very great favour.’
‘Of course,’ said Tom. ‘What is it?’
‘I’ve finally come to accept that Hugh is not the man for me or my baby. I don’t think he will stick by me – but even if he intends to, I can’t be sure he won’t reject our child or come to resent us both.’
‘I’m glad you’re not going to be taken in by that man’s empty promises,’ Tom said. ‘I’ve been worried that—’
‘Tom,’ Esmie interrupted, ‘let Stella speak.’
Stella swallowed. ‘MrLomax, you and Esmie are the kindest and most compassionate couple I know. I’m asking, for the sake of my baby, whether you could...whether you would agree to be parents...to him or her?’
They looked at her open-mouthed in astonishment and confusion.
‘What do you mean?’ asked Tom.
‘Stella, are you saying you want to give up your child?’ Esmie gasped.
