Page 124 of Sapphire Flame
“Scared. Alone.”
When did it start? Right after you made love?
Natalie shook her head. “No, not right away. I think it was when Grant left the bed to take his shower. I’d had all this feel-good pumping through my veins. I mean, I wasn’t sure whether I’d ever come back to earth.”
Renee leaned forward. The sudden motion sent the mist flowing backward then returning to give the spirit more shape.Did you see stars? I saw stars once. Maybe even the whole universe.
“Yes, it was exactly like that.”
Another sigh and an odd fluctuating of mist.Yup, I’m still pissed about being dead.
Natalie chuckled. “I like you. I want you to know that.”
But do you like Grant? I mean, really like him?
“I do. I admire the hell out of him. Did you know your burrow home just got obliterated?”
Yes, though I have to say his devoted wolves made a solid replica in here with many improvements of which I strongly approve. Okay, so back to the moment when he left the bed and took his shower. What were you thinking about? Or maybe that’s not the right question. What happened, because I think I know.
“Give me your best guess.” Natalie stared at Renee, waiting for her response.
Renee narrowed her eyes but didn’t say anything for a long time. Finally, she said,I’m not sure if it’s Grant’s flaw or if it’s his strong suit or if it’s just a very male thing, but I’ll bet that when he left the bedroom, you felt a wall come down.
Natalie thought for a moment. “That’s it exactly. But I don’t want to sound like a whiner. He’s got a big job to do.”
He can shift gears on a dime. I remember feeling hurt a few times until I got used to it. In the middle of things, when we’d make love, I knew he was with me, completely. But I felt like I was a compartment in his head that the moment he was done with me, he closed the door and shut me out.
“Well, it did feel like that. But I’m not so much hurt as scared. We’ve been in the middle of this nightmare before, yet as long as we moved together, side by side, we were able to stay alive. Now that he’s not here, I’m petrified.”
Okay. I get it. You were shot recently, weren’t you?
“Up through my calf and into my thigh. It hurt.”
Right. The threat isn’t gone, either, is it?
“No, and my guess is this whole thing is going to get a lot worse.”
Probably.She crossed her arms over her chest. The mist flew around until it reformed.I’m pissed he didn’t finish that bastard off.
“He wanted to. I know he did. But I’m sure he thought it a bad precedent.”
Damn him for being honorable.
Natalie laughed out loud. “I thought the same thing. I wish I’d had my Glock with me. I wouldn’t have been so gracious.” She then held Renee’s gaze. “So, what is it you need to tell me this time because I sense you have some kind of message for me.”
Right. Well, I’ve been told to be extremely careful with what I tell you. I mean this is, after all, your life and your path, what you have to go through. But the Higher-ups want you to take a look at your deepest fears and they have little to do with dying or the pain of battle or that Kryder blew up Grant’s burrow.
“What fears?” Natalie really was confused. What could possibly be worse than Kryder deciding, for instance, that his next move would be to blow up the Meldorin Compound?
Renee shrugged, and the mist did a quick up-and-down flow. This time, however, it didn’t reform. Instead, Renee said one last thing before she vanished,Good luck, Sister.
Natalie felt completely deflated. This was the second time in a matter of a few minutes that she’d been left completely alone. She sure wished she’d been given a little more information.
She’d never dreaded the solitary state before. Yet she did now, as though it didn’t feel right anymore.
She heard her wolf whimper inside her.
Her wolf.
