Page 40 of Heal You
At least Gillian seemed open to the idea of Jan falling for someone else.That was a positive to take away from this conversation.Only if Jan had her way, it wouldn’t be a Spanish hunk.It would be a gorgeous English bartender…anda woman.“Who knows who I’ll meet now that I’m single.”
Gillian’s smile faded quickly.“Hearing you say that feels strange.It’s always been Jan and Phil.Christmas cards, invitations, in conversation.”
“Well, now it’s just Jan.”Jan smiled at the server as she set their cappuccinos down.She instantly brought hers closer and added one sugar cube.“And you know what, I quite like that.”
“One thing Ineverexpected was you to be happy if your marriage ended.”Gillian eyed Jan as she stirred her own cappuccino.She knew her best friend was trying to read her.“Is this just a front, love?”
“Actually, it’s not.I do feel good about the future.Once I’ve found a place I can call my own, the world is mine for the taking.”
“That’s a good attitude to have.”
“I think watching you go through your divorce just reminded me of what I never want to happen.The thought of just existing in a house all day, only leaving it to go to work, cutting myself off from everyone around me.You know?”
“I’ll admit that I didn’t deal with my divorce very well, but look at me now.”Gillian opened her arms out and grinned.“I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”
“And that’s what I’m holding onto.Knowing you recovered…then I know I can, too.”Jan couldn’t be any prouder of Gillian for the way she’d handled the last couple of years.Yes, there had been many times when she thought she was losing Gillian, but as they sat here now, Gillian looked incredibly happy.“I know it was tough for you, and you know I was there for you any time you needed me, but Iwillcome to you if I think I’m drowning in all of it.I promise.”
“I know you will.You always could handle things better than me.”
“I don’t think it’s a case of handling it better or worse than one another.Everyone deals with life and their issues differently.It doesn’t make any one person stronger or weaker.We just choose to deal how we deal.”
“You always were better with words than me, too.”Gillian smiled as she rested her head in the palm of her hand.“I do have to say, though, that you’re looking very happy.Healthy and unbothered by all of this.”
Mm.It’s hard to care when a beautiful woman shows up in your life unexpectedly.
“I can’t change what he did.Why bother letting it fester and make me feel miserable?I have a life to live, Gill.I have a whole entire world out there to explore.Who knows where it leads.”
Gillian raised her cappuccino cup between them.“You know what, I’ll cheers to that.”
“Me, too.”Jan clinked her cup to Gillian’s and exhaled a contented sigh.“Phil is doing what he wants, and I’m going to do the very same thing!”
Chapter16
“So,”Morgan spoke quietly as she grazed her nails through Jan’s hair.They’d been spread out on the couch for the last two hours, but Morgan was beside herself, knowing she would be alone with this woman for an entire week.“Did you happen to come across those bikinis we talked about?”
Jan grinned as she tilted her head back and eyed Morgan.“I wondered why you were so quiet.Have you been fantasising?”
“Would you hate me if I said yes?”
“Never.”Jan splayed a hand across Morgan’s chest and gazed back at her.Almost lovingly.“I’ve already been thinking about you in a bikini.”
Morgan’s chest expanded.Being with Jan was incredibly fulfilling.And every little thing she learned about Jan was only willing Morgan towards a future with her.“I think we’re going to have a great time out there with one another.”
“It’s all I’ve had on my mind lately.”Jan dipped her hand beneath Morgan’s shirt.“Do you have plans for out there already?”
“Not really.I usually take it day by day, depending on the weather.If it’s too hot, we can travel north where it’s a little cooler for the day.If it’s windy, then the pool is your best option in terms of sunbathing.Trust me, you don’t want to be on the beach when it’s windy.”
“I’m glad you know your way around the place.I won’t have to worry about a single thing.I’ll just take your lead.”
Morgan’s stomach rippled when Jan dragged her nails across her skin.“Mm.That feels nice.”
“All of you feels nice.”Jan dipped her head and pressed her lips to Morgan’s stomach.“And I’m dying to be alone with you in another country.”
“Why?”Morgan asked, brow furrowed.
“I don’t know.I just feel as though we can be ourselves out there.”
Morgan understood what Jan was saying.The number of times Morgan had wanted to stride across her bar and kiss Jan in front of everyone were too many to count.When they met up for lunch, she wanted to take her hand and pull Jan that little bit closer as they walked around town.One day, it would be possible, but right now wasn’t the time.“You’ll feel less on edge.”
