Page 64 of Hidden Resolution
Admittedly, not one of her finer days.
“Yeah, who wants a flat-chested teenager when they could feel up your glorious tits in person?” he said as he tossed the book and dove for her.
They wrestled for control of the covers, and when he pulled her on top of him, their laughing gazes locked.
God, she loved him. The feeling was bittersweet, all things considered.
Suddenly, kidding didn’t feel appropriate anymore. They’d been over less than twenty-four hours ago. But the second he showed up with the Guy’s Guarantee for Valentine’s Day Sex package, her good sense abandoned her and her body assumed command, locking her brain out of its control center. None of their issues were resolved.
“Mason, before you order dinner, can we talk?”
His brow arched with concern. “Why does your tone worry me?”
“Because I’m a fearsome woman warrior?”
“That might be it.” He grinned. “Okay, lay it on me. What’s running through that beautiful head of yours?”
She ran her finger along the edge of the sheet, buying time. If she blurted what she was thinking, it would come out all wrong, probably triggering him into running.
“Come out with it, love. Rip the bandage off. I’m a big boy. I can take it if you don’t want to see me again.”
His dark expression claimed differently, but she wouldn’t go there.
“That’s not it.” Her resolve began to stall out, but she pushed through. “Idowant to see you again. But you have to know I’m falling for you. Our time together isn’t a fling for me anymore.” She blew out a shaky breath. “I was willing to play by your rules—at first—but you keep changing them. It’s impossible to interpret your continual return. And the sweet gestures… from anyone else, it screams caring.”
He didn’t reply, and the silence was weighted.
Summoning the last of her courage, she charged on. “The flowers, the balloon… please tell me what I’m supposed to take from those?”
“Why does it have to mean anything more than what it is?” His vibe shifted, becoming harder and guarded. “I brought you flowers and chocolates because every woman deserves them. The balloon was a throw-in from the florist.”
Cold permeated her bones. “You didn’t pick theBe My Valentineballoon?”
He thunked his head back against the headboard and closed his eyes.
“No.”
“You really don’t want a future together, do you?” she asked, dreading his response.
The flicker of hesitation in his eyes and the set of his jaw spoke volumes. She steeled herself against the coming truth.
“I told you at the airport. I want you on a level I’ve never wanted another woman. For longer than I’ve ever wanted another woman.” He rolled his head to meet her gaze. “Why can’t that be enough?”
Everything around her blurred, and the ache pressing behind her eyes became so intense it bordered on physical pain.
He’d been honest, and she needed to be, too.
“Because I’m too old for ‘casual fucks,’ Mason,” she said calmly. Though where she found the Zen was anyone’s guess. “I want more. I want to build something lasting with someone who loves me. I want a home with the two-point-five kids, maybe a dog, and my two fat, old cats.” Scrunching the covers to her chest, she shifted to kneel in front of him. “If I wait much longer, my age starts to work against me. I’ll be middle-aged, with no prospects and a uterus that might be entering hostile territory. Can you understand where I’m coming from?”
His reply was soft, nearly reverent. “I can.”
“And?”
“I can’t give you what you want.”
Her lungs locked, and she had to force herself to nod.
“Fair enough. Then I’m going to ask you not to come back, okay? I n-need to…” She pinched the bridge of her nose and tried again, steadier this time. “I need to manage the process of getting over you, and your hanging around won’t facilitate a healthy break.”
