Page 71 of A Very Snowed In New Year
“What?!”
“And Billy and Donna are here with the kids.”
“Oh my God! I can’t believe you’re all hanging out without me!” I am legit jealous of my parents and Ben right now.
I can hear Declan crooning in the background. “Should old acquaintance be forgot—everybody!Aaaaand never brought to mind!I can’t hear you!Should old acquaintance be for—wait, I sang that already.”
Maddie yells at him that it’s too soon. Suddenly, the Chumbawamba song drowns out everything else until I hear Nolan shout out “Youeejit!” and there is silence.
“Oh hey, Piper! Happy new year.” It’s Eddie. Stopping by my dad’s phone to say hi to me. Even with Holden Archer in the next room and the wholebeing related to him by marriagething, my heart still skips a beat when I see Eddie Cannavale’s impossibly handsome face. “You in LA? Why aren’t you here?”
“Eddie! I’m in California! I didn’t even know about this gathering until one minute ago!”
“Hey, gopahkyour faceovahby thebah, Pretty Boy Magee.” Billy Boston appears from out of nowhere. “Heya, Pipes!Happy New Year tooooo youse!Where you at? I’ll send achoppah.”
“Hey, Billy! I’m actually in California and I have plans, but I miss all of you so much.”
“Well, I’m wicked rich, you know? I can send a jet or something. I know a guy.”
“I’m good, Billy, but thank you.”
Nolan shoves him out of the way and holds up a pint of Guinness to the camera. “Piper, my bonnie lass. In the new year, may your right hand always be stretched out in friendship, never in want.Sláinte.”
“Sláinte, Nolan!”
“Wish you were here, sugar.” I can finally see my dad again.
“Hey, girl!” My mom’s unbelievably happy face pops up behind my dad’s shoulder. “Is that a new sweater?”
“Sort of…” I feel like if there is such a thing as a good time to let your parents know you’re stuck in a mountain cabin with a hot guy overnight, that time is when they’re super tipsy at a party with a bunch of cool people. “It’s actually my friend’s sweater…” I get up and open the bedroom door. “Funny story—remember I told you about the actress I’ve been working for? She sent me to run an errand for her this morning, which is why I’m here at a very cute, very warm cabin in Big Bear Lake, and I can’t leave now because it’s snowing and the actress wasn’t able to get here—but you don’t have to worry because I’m here withthisguy!” I pan the phone around to where Holden is stoking a very responsible-looking fire while looking super hot but very responsible.
“Hello there!” Holden takes the phone from me in a very alpha but polite way that I like a lot. “You must be Mr. and Mrs. Puckett. It’s very nice to meet you. I’m Holden.”
“Whoa,” my mom says. “Are you the guy from the jeans commercial with the butt?”
“Mooooommmm!”
“I am indeed that guy. That’s some of my best work. Happy New Year. I’d just like to say that I think your girl Piper is a wonderful young woman. We’ve been corresponding via email and text for a little while now?—”
“Wait, you have?” says my mom. “Wait, you’re Zephyr! Wait, you’ve been emailing with Piper? Wait, what’s happening? Josh, say something.”
My dad is just staring at his phone and smiling. “Okay.” He blinks. “So, it’s just the two of you over there? In a cabin? Is that what I heard?”
“Yes,” I tell him. “Lainey has the address. You have Lainey’s contact info.”
“Okay.” My dad swallows hard. “Okay.”
“I have a great deal of respect and affection for your daughter, sir. I just want you to know that.”
My dad clears his throat. “Okay… Okay. Very nice to meet you, Holden. Have a happy new year, both of you, and just stay safe and let us know if you need anything.”
“Absolutely. You all have a safe and wonderful night too,” Holden says.
“Thank you. Good night, sweet pea.”
“Good night, Daddy. Love you.” I end the call before either of us starts crying. That went well. “Wow,” I say to Holden. “You’re the Dad Whisperer.”
“Told you.” He shrugs. “But everything I said was true.”
