Page 41 of A Very No Strings Halloween
“Yes! Yes, now I remember! I’ve been looking for them everywhere. You must help me find the letters, you see?!”
“The lettersuandc?”
“Nooooo! The letters you wrote to me, you fool! Where are they? Did youget rid of them?! I told you never to get rid of them! Why do you never listen to me?!” She screams and then covers her own ears, holds her head like she has a headache. A little melodramatic, but she’s really into it. “What’s happening? Oh no. I’m going away again.”
“Just take a deep breath.”
She wails and reaches out for me like she’s being dragged away, and I grab her hand, but she drops back and lies on the table, staring up at the ceiling. Then Donna’s eyes snap shut. She trembles and jitters and shakes. It’s scary and weird and hot, and I have so many feelings about what’s happening right now and I’m gonna have to tell my priest about all of them tomorrow.
Donna starts chanting, and it echoes all over the house. The hallway light flickers. The chandelier shakes. Donna’s body jerks. The bedroom door opens on its own. Another door slams downstairs.
And then silence.
Donna lies on the table, totally limp, like after she’s had a massive orgasm.
Which maybe she has?
Everything happened so fast, and I have no idea what’s going on.
For a second it seems like she’s not breathing.
“Donna?”
I touch her arm.
Her eyes open. She gasps. “Billy.”
“Donna?”
“What am I doing on the table?” She slowly tries to get up, and I help her. “Why is my blouse ripped?” Her voice is hoarse.
“You don’t remember?”
She touches her forehead. “Oh my God, how much did I drink? I feel so foggy.” She looks around, then remembers I just said something. “Remember what? What happened?”
I help her off the table. “I mean, I already knew you were a good actress, but this was really something. You okay?”
She rubs her temples. “I think so?”
“Did you bring any water or just wine?” I look through her bag and find a bottle of water to give to her. “Drink this.”
She gulps it down. “Oh my God. I’ve never been so thirsty.”
“Yeah. Well. Lara was pretty thirsty too, lemme tell ya. Should we continue this on the bed, or…?”
“Lara…” She looks around and sees the Ouija board and planchette on the floor. “We have to close the session,” she says. She hands me the empty water bottle, picks up the Ouija board and planchette, and places them back on the table. “Sit down and put your hands on the thingy again,” she orders.
“Yes, ma’am.”
With both our hands touchingthe thingy, Donna says, “We now close this session. Thank you for communicating with us, Lara. Goodbye.” Then she slides the planchette over to the wordsGood Byeon the board. She flicks my fingers away and places the planchette upside down on the table, away from the board. Then she flips the board over. “We now break the connection with the spirit world.” She gets up to grab her purse and pulls out a sage wand, picks up one of the candles from the floor, lights it, and uses it to light the sage. Then she waves the wand around the circle and the room. “I clear the air, I clear the air, I clear the air… Okay, seriously, what happened? How do I not remember getting on the table?”
I can’t tell if she’s still acting or not, but I recount what happened. I tell her what she said. Or what Lara said. What she said as Lara. I tell her what Lara wanted. About the letters. And the making love.
“Wow. That’s intense. I don’t remember it. I mean, I remember contacting her and her moving the planchette… Thatwasher, right? You didn’t move it?”
“No. It wasn’t me. But I mean, it was you, right?”
“No. It wasn’t me either.”
