Page 40 of A Very Friendly Valentine's Day
Chapter Twelve
ALANA: Hi.
ALANA: Still having fun on the train?
ALANA: Because I’m having an amazing time reading all these comments and DMs about how in love you are with that girl.
ALANA: And how I need to dump you.
EDDIE: Babe I was going to call you but I wasn’t getting a signal. Calling you now.
ALANA: Don’t bother.
ALANA: I’m too mad to talk to you right now.
EDDIE: Babe. She’s just a friend and I was just acting. I told you.
ALANA: I know what you told me.
ALANA: But I also know what I saw in that video.
ALANA: I know what everyone sees in that video.
EDDIE: Did it really not occur to you that I’m a good actor?
ALANA: Did it really not occur to you to tell me that the “friend” you’re traveling with is a woman?
ALANA: Did it really not occur to you that someone would film you professing your love to her?
ALANA: Did you seriously not think for one second about how that would effect ME?
EDDIE: It was a monologue written by William Shakespeare. I’m sorry that it didn’t occur to me how it would AFFECT you when I was totally in character. And I’ve been friends with Birdie for six years. We’re just friends.
ALANA: Please.
ALANA: I’ve had sex with literally every guy friend I’ve ever had.
EDDIE: Are you serious?
ALANA:
EDDIE: Well I’ve never had sex with Birdie and I haven’t had sex with ANYONE since you and I decided to be exclusive.
ALANA: Oh…
ALANA: Was THAT what we decided?
ALANA: Oops!
EDDIE: What is that supposed to mean? I think we need to have this conversation over FaceTime.
ALANA: Can’t.
ALANA: I have a fitting in half an hour.
ALANA: For a designer friend of mine.
ALANA: A straight designer friend.
