Page 52 of The Flirtation
“Avery.”
“What. It is what it is, we haven’t discussed it. It’s just a workation fling. That’s athing.”
“You need to tell him how youfeel.”
“And how do I feel, dear sister, please tellme.”
“Avery Gwendolyn Davis.” She lowered her voice even more. She was exhausted and she was in no mood for messing around. “You need to tell him how much you care about him. Don’t break his heart twenty-four hours after you broke Jackson’sarm.”
My jaw dropped. “You did not just saythat.”
“No I didn’t. Delete that lastsentence.”
I made a face. “Oh my God—you were the one who was all ‘just shag him on the island you don’t have to think about what comesnext!’”
“I know but that was before he crossed the Atlantic even further to be with you and then came here in the middle of the night and was great with my kids. That was before I saw how he looks atyou.”
“He came to New York to meet withclients.”
“Please.”
“Why aren’t you happy that I had a fling with a hot British guy? We seized the moment by the balls and blah blah blah now it’s time to get back tolife.”
“Avery, that man isin—”
“Don’t sayit.”
“I’mserious.”
“Please, it’ll just make itharder.”
“Harder for what—for you to behappy?”
“For me to...say goodbye tohim.”
She gave me that Big Sister look, the one that made my insides collapse. “You know. I wasn’t ever going to tell you this, but before Mom died, when you were at Wharton, she made me promise her that I wouldn’t let you drive awayhappiness.”
“Wow. You’re actually saying this to menow?”
“’Drive away happiness,’ that’s what she said. That is what you’re doing right now, and I will not sit here and watch you do it, not tohim.”
“I’m not doing anything—I have priorities—I have to deal with things at work—you wouldn’tunderstand.”
She stiffened. “Why, because I don’t have acareer?”
“No, because you married the love of your life right out of college and have two beautiful kids who will always loveyou!”
“Wait—what?”
I shifted in my seat so that Luke couldn’t see me behind my sister. My voice was small and child-like. “I just feel so vulnerable with him. I don’t know what it is, but it feels like I could lose everything and I can’t afford to feel that way.Ever.”
“That’s intimacy, Avery. Jimmy has literally seen a load of crap come out of me when I gave birth to our daughter, but he still wants to get up in there. When men are in love they are wonderful and that man, Luke, he is very wonderful and you deserve to be happy withhim.”
“Mom deserved to behappy.”
“Mom was happy. She was never vulnerable. Dad left and she did what she had to do and she got over it. For some reason you never did. Not every man is like Dad. We may never understand why he left, but that’s his problem, it’s not ours. And Mom didn’t lose everything. She had us. She did everything for us. If you push Luke away, then what did she do it allfor?”
My eyes were flooded with tears. I blinked and dabbed at my eyes, with my Kelly green scarf. “I can’t do this now. I have to go to work. Love you, I’ll call youlater.”
