Page 36 of The Flirtation
Avery covered her mouth to keep from laughing out loud. “I’ll let him know—we’ll be right there! I mean I’ll be right there and so will he,separately!”
“Very good, Miss.” I could tell Samson was smiling. He knew that I was there with her, he was nofool.
She quickly buttoned up my shirt while I ensured that her luscious breasts were securely tucked away inside the top of her beautifuldress.
“We still have to work together,” she said, disappearing to the restroom and returning with a damp face cloth with which to wipe her lipstick off of myface.
“I know, we’re so lucky,” Isaid.
She laughed. “You know what I mean.” She tidied up her ownface.
“I am quite capable of being discreet,” I assured her, while walking around the room, taking deep breaths and thinking about my grandmother’s country garden, in an attempt to rid myself of some pretty glaring physical evidence of the rather hasty work we had just donetogether.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I should have found a better timeto—”
“Do not apologize for that. To becontinued.”
“Should I go outfirst?”
“Certainly, yes, goahead.”
“Okay.Sorry.”
“Don’t—”
“I know but I didn’t mean to get youall—”
“See you down there!” I said. “Be right behindyou.”
“Okay.” She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, checked herself in the mirror again and went out thedoor.
As soon as she’d gone I started laughing. “What the hell just happened?” What had she just told me? Something about her dating a vibrator? One of our clients was about to get married and we were groping each other like teenagers in the backseat of a car. I had to get it together. She’d probably lost all respect for me already. Now she thought I was just some repressed horny git who couldn’t keep it in his pants once an attractive woman showed any interest in him.What is she doing tome?
I heard a Van Morrison song playing from the speakers on the patio and knew I was about to do yet another Hugh Grant imitation as I arrived late to awedding.
Avery
Ihad barely caughtmy breath and found a spot on the sand amongst less than ten people, when I saw Luke appear, looking dashing and unfazed, just as “Into the Mystic” started fading away and Bucket and Ingrid joined hands and facedSamson.
It really was a casual ceremony—simple and perfect. There were Tiki torches, candles in hurricane lanterns and string lights, designating a special ceremony area, and an altar of bamboo, bougainvillea and palm fronds, where Samson and Bucket and Ingrid stood, with the ocean and sunset as a backdrop. The guests—myself, Luke, Dao, the maid and chef, as well as a good-looking man and woman that I did not know but who looked very familiar to me—all stood around like we were at a cocktail party and watched. I couldn’t look at Luke, and I’m quite certain that he had no intention of making eye contact with me. He stood about ten feet away, chatting quietly with the chef, who had handed him a bottle of beer. I myself was sipping on the fancy rum and coconut concoction that Dao had insisted Idrink.
Apparently Samson was an ordained minister, on top of being a chauffeur, Jurassic Park enthusiast and closet ladies man. He thanked us all for being here, thanked Bucket and Ingrid for the honor of marrying them, told a beautiful and charming story about the first wedding he’d ever been to, about some Bahamanian wedding traditions, what led him to getting ordained, and then told us that Bucket and Ingrid had “written” their ownvows.
Ingrid’s hair was wavy and she wore a dainty floral headband, white sundress, and no shoes. She was so pretty it was ridiculous. She recounted the first time she’d seen Buck in her tea shop, and the second and third time. She told us that every time she saw him she thought it might be the last time, and had enjoyed every minute with him in a way that she never had before with anyone else. She said that he had somehow quickly become her best friend and business mentor, despite being completely naughty most of the time. She said that she hadn’t even thought about being married to anyone, but as soon as he asked her to marry him she knew that she wanted to be hiswife.
Bucket had been full of surprises ever since I’d met him, but at his wedding ceremony he really blew my mind. He wore a white linen shirt and pants, bare feet, of course. He seemed so calm and happy, like a surfer Buddha Ken doll, if that makes sense (I know it doesn’t). He looked at Ingrid in the way that anyone would want a loved one to look at her. He said: “People think us surfers are just super chill, that we ride the waves and listen to Pearl Jam and eat fish tacos all day…” He paused for effect. “We do.” We, the small crowd, laughed knowingly. “But being out there in the middle of the great beautiful ocean, being here on a beautiful tropical island, you come face to face with the reality that you could get swallowed up by a rogue wave or a hurricane at any minute. When you survive or you’re bypassed, you count your blessings. And when you come face to face with a beautiful woman, one that you can talk to, that you can listen to, that you can be yourself with, and bask in the glory of all that she is, you know that only love is real, and there is onlynow.”
I could feel Luke’s eyes on me. I glanced over at him. He was contemplating me, it seemed, but when he saw me looking at him he looked back at the bride and groom. Was he thinking about how false I had been with him? About how he couldn’t possibly talk to me anymore, knowing that I had told him fanciful stories about my relationship with an orgasm-inducing plug-indevice?
“I love you now, Ingrid,” Bucket continued, somehow speaking only to her yet also sharing the moment with all of us. “All that I am, everything that is mine is yours, and I will count my blessings every minute of life on this planet now that you are mywife.”
The ceremony lasted about ten minutes, and when it was over I’m sure I was not the only one who was wondering why all weddings weren’t like this. After Bucket kissed the bride, the bouncy Stevie Wonder song “For Once in my Life” started blaring from some unseen speakers, and we all cheered and started dancing around them, and Bucket and Ingrid just wanted to eat and drink and be merry on the beach. It was all so cool, I had to wonder what the hell a dork like me was doing there. But they were so cool that they made me feel totally athome.
I tried not to remember word-for-word what I had actually said to Luke a short while earlier. I must have sounded totally nuts. I tried not to think about where my hands had gone and where his tongue had been and what we surely would have done if Samson hadn’t knocked on the door when he did.I will not regret anything. I do not regret anything. Why aren’t you looking at me Luke Mason? Wait—what did that lookmean?
I turned away and walked over to the buffet and stared at some shrimp. “You must be Bucket’s business manager.” I looked over my shoulder to see the gorgeous woman smiling at me. “You should try the shrimp, it’s delish. So I’m told. I’m not eating seafood right now, sadly.” She patted her baby bump. “I’m Molly Kidd, I work with Buckettoo.”
“Oh my God you’re Molly Kidd!” Molly Kidd and her husband Ryan went to Wharton a year ahead of me. Everyone thought they were a couple back then, but apparently they were just friends. Later, they formed a startup called Workstyle, which was the Warby Parker of office supplies. Bucket had become an investor in it and the company just totally blew up. It was a huge success. “I am such a fan of your products, my office is filled with them.” I hugged her, and she managed to hold onto her plate of food without spilling it, because she is a rock star and I was tipsy. “It’s so nice to meet you finally. I’m always asking Bucket about you. I’m a superfan.”
