Page 119 of The Sovereign: Part One
“He didn’t outright kill the idea.That’s something.”
I folded my arms, not to challenge him, but to hold the spiraling in place.“You didn’t hear his voice the way I did.That wasn’t hesitation.That was a warning.He’s afraid, and that’s not like him.”
Maxim leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs, eyes scanning the floor like it might offer answers.“Maybe it’s not fear.He’s protective,” he said, voice even.“That much is clear.But I keep thinking about what he said, about how you should’ve left with him.That things are about to change.”He shook his head slightly.“I don’t know what he meant by that.I’ve run every model I can build from what I know, and still—nothing definitive.”
He looked up at me, quickly adjusting when he saw the look on my face.
“Hecouldbe afraid.You know him better than anyone else here.Is it possible it only looks like fear from our perspective, and it’s actually something worse—certainty?”
“Anything is possible, I suppose.”
“Maybe he knows the Veyr won’t accept them and doesn’t want to say why.Or maybe,” Maxim added, with a flicker of self-aware irony.“Roan came off the wrong way during one of his visits and the Veyr already decided that he isn’t right for The Vale and has said as much to Joss.”He gave a faint, reassuring smile.“I’m speculating.Reaching.I know that.But that’s what I do.I calculate risk, run probabilities, look for shape in the noise.And right now, none of it looks good.But that doesn’t mean we stop trying.It just means we prepare for worse and hope for better.”
“You still thinking aboutthose specific wordshave nothing to do with the thought of me leaving with him to The Vale?”I asked, dubious.
He stifled a grin.“Another maybe.”His gaze met mine.“But Roan isn’t going to give up.We have to find a solution for them, and fast.”
“Between the wall and The Vale, there’s only the Strenn Corridor.No transit lines, no marked zones, nothing sanctioned.Just raw land and everything feral waiting within it.And then there’s Roan, convinced they’ll survive it because he’s taken a few Hiven-escorted excursions and believes love is enough.”
Maxim exhaled.Not a laugh, more the sound of someone sorting through words for the ones that wouldn’t make things worse.He was threading that careful line between truth and comfort, trying to calm my nerves without dismissing them.
“He’s not wrong to believe in it,” Maxim said after a pause.“And he’s not helpless.Or so I’ve heard.He’s held his own when things turned volatile on those expeditions.”
“He had backup and a secondary plan.If he goes alone, and something happens to him, Bellam will be defenseless and alone in the wilderness.Roan is strong, agile, strategic, and brave.But that doesn’t always translate out there where anything can happen.Especially not when you’re running on emotion and desperation.”
“Do you think, if it comes down to traveling alone with no guarantees or safety net, Bellam will go?”
I hesitated.“She’s agreed to go because she loves him.She trusts him.And I’m getting the feeling she won’t say no, even if she should.”
Maxim stood, giving a quick prompt to Calyx.Moments later, he returned with two leirs and a decanter of something pale.I took a sip, feeling something both cool and sharp flowing down my throat.I leaned into him and sighed.“Much needed, thank you.”
“I can promise you this, I won’t let them go alone,” he said.“If Joss won’t guide them, I will.”
I looked at him, stunned.“You’d do that?”
“If it comes to it.”
“And if you’re flagged?If you can’t come back?”
“That won’t happen.”
I shook my head, caught between awe and rising panic.“You’re always ten steps ahead, I understand that, but youcan’t planforeverything.I’m starting to worry your certainty might—”
He reached for my hand, his voice barely above a whisper.“Isara.I’ve considered it.”
I met his eyes, breath catching.“You haven’t.You haven’t because if you had, you wouldn’t be so quick to risk what it would do to me if I lost you.”
I felt my eyes burn with tears, and it seemed to surprise Maxim as much as it did me.
“You’re worried you’ll lose me?”
“We are days away from our Oathbond.Joss was right.I could’ve left when he asked, but I didn’t.This isn’t a convenient pairing for me, Maxim.I’ve waited for you my whole life.I’ve lo…” I paused and cleared my throat.“Yes.But to say I’mworriedwould be a spectacular failure of language.”
His mouth lifted, just barely, a ghost of a smile that reached his eyes before his lips.
“As long as you’re happy.That’s all I want, Isara.If it’s with me, I’ll go to the ends of the earth.I’d take on Sentinels, the Verdant Maw, the Drave.I’d even brave the gas pockets choking The Null.For you, for anyone you love.But when it comes to Joss…” He paused.“I’ll never tire of hearing that you chose me.I can fight someone who wants you.I can’t fight someone you want.”
Good,” I said, deadpan.“Watching you wrestle yourself would be tragically undignified.”
