Page 14 of Prudence
“Good, keep it that way,” she said, and everything within me deflated.
I glanced at Mam. “You said Padraig was unkind. What exactly does that mean?”
“It means he broke my heart into a million pieces,” Nell answered dramatically. “And he—”
“I’m not sure this is an appropriate story for Milly to hear,” Mam interjected, a worried look on her face.
“She’s eighteen years old, Tina. I think Milly’s mature enough to hear what happened to me. It’s a cautionary tale and will hopefully deter her from making the same mistakes I did.”
Okay, now I really needed to know. I’d never met Derek’s dad, but from all accounts, he was a well-respected, upstanding member of the community. I couldn’t imagine him treating my aunt in such a way as a teenager that clearly still haunted her to this day.
“Well, I suppose you can tell her,” Mam allowed before levelling me with a pointed stare, “But don’t go passing it on to Donna or Jane.”
“I won’t, I promise.”
Aunt Nell drew in a deep breath then settled her gaze on me. “When we were both just seventeen, Padraig Balfe and I were boyfriend and girlfriend. We were mad about each other, totally in love, or at leastIwas. We took silly chances when it came to sex, and it was no surprise that I ended up pregnant.”
“But—” I didn’t finish what I was about to say when realisation dawned. Aunt Nell didn’t have any children. So that meant …Oh God.
“When I told Padraig, he wanted no part in the pregnancy and pushed me to seek an abortion. I had to travel over to London on my own since I only had enough money for one ticket. It was the worst experience of my life, and when I got back, Padraig dumped me. I fell into such a deep depression that I dropped out of school and didn’t finish my Leaving Cert. It took three years for me to finally get back on track. Padraig Balfe stole that time from me, time that I would never get back, and—"
“Okay,” Mam interjected. “I think that’s enough for now.”
I felt my aunt’s pain as she recounted her story, and I was upset on her behalf. To think of her having to travel alone for an abortion as a young girl was horrifying. “I’m so sorry that happened to you,” I whispered, a lump in my throat.
Aunt Nell reached across the table to take my hand into both of hers. “Just learn from my mistakes, Milly. You’re a bright, wonderful girl with so much potential. I’d hate to you see get caught up with a boy like Derek Balfe and mess up your future.”
Her warning stayed with me for the rest of the day. For the next few days, in fact. And when Derek texted me to extend an invite from his sister to join her and their cousin, Charli, for a girls’ night at the Balfe house, I was conflicted as to whether to attend. It felt like a betrayal of my aunt to even associate with the children of the man who treated her so callously. But at the same time, I couldn’t deny that Derek wasn’t his father.They might’ve looked alike, but that didn’t mean they were the same person. He’d been nothing but kind to me, and it wasn’t fair to blame him for something that had happened long before he was even born. I also struggled to contain the feelings I’d already developed for him. He’d wheedled his way under my skin somehow, and I had no clue how to purge him out. I also wanted to get to know his sister. Nuala was just one of those girls who emitted positive energy and kindness, the sort of girl I would love to be friends with, especially since I didn’t have many to begin with.
In the end, I reasoned that spending time with Nuala and their cousin would be harmless. Derek wouldn’t even be there, and neither would his parents since they were away for the evening. Besides, I didn’t believe in blaming children for the misdeeds of their parents, especially since Derek had been a complete gentleman so far.
Perhaps I could explain to Aunt Nell the next time I saw her that just because she’d gone through a terrible thing, it didn’t mean the same was going to happen to me. I tried to convince myself that she’d understand and give me her blessing, but for some reason, the pit in my stomach remained.
5.
Derek
Something had changed. Ever since Milly’s parents and aunt had come home, I’d felt her withdrawing from me, and I had no idea why. We’d sat at her kitchen table talking for ages, and I’d felt like we’d broken down a barrier, gotten closer. But then, nothing.
I didn’t hear from her for days.
When Nuala asked if I’d invite Milly to her girls’ night in with Charli, I took a chance, and surprisingly, Milly agreed to go. The lads and I were at Aidan’s hanging out. Our parents were away at an event and the plan was to let my sister have the house for the night, but I was struggling to stick to that plan. I wanted to see Milly, speak to her, reassure myself that the connection we shared wasn’t all in my own head.
“How about I call Francesca and a few of the girls to come over?” Aidan suggested.
“No,” I said grouchily. “I’m still pissed at her for how she acted when Milly got drenched with the ice water at your party.”
Tristan threw his hands up. “Can I just say I’m still feeling particularly shitty about that?”
“Good. Your guilt should last until Christmas at least,” I said and noticed Aidan smirking at me.
“Don’t you like Fran? She’s a big fan of yours.”
“No, I do not like her. She was a bitch to Milly when it took me weeks to get the girl to agree to come to a party with me in the first place.”
“First world problems,” Theo said with a chuckle. “Poor Derek. So many pretty girls to choose from.”
I lifted my middle finger in response then noticed my brother was scrutinising me for a long moment before he said, “I think we should go back to our house. Hang out with Nuala, Charli and Milly for a while.”
