Page 10 of Rogue If You Want To
“If you hadn’t scented him as your mate, he would have died, so you saved him,” Creven told me.
That didn’t make me feel much better.
“Otto is special.”Auden heaved Otto out of the car and hoisted him up into his arms as if my mate weighed nothing. Creven nodded, so he must have agreed with him.
I knew that, as Otto was my mate, but how was he special to these shifters?
“He’s not just any shifter.” Creven followed Auden, and I raced along behind. “He’s an otter shifter, and whichever pack or family he belongs to is powerful, and now he’s our problem.”
6
OTTO
After my grandfather passed, I pictured what it had been like for him as he left this realm and went to join the goddess. I pictured him being here one second and then suddenly running along a riverbank, floating through the water, catching something to eat, playing with others, and being pain-free, care-free, and happy… so very happy.
This gave me such comfort as I grieved his loss, and I’d held onto that belief up until now.
Now that my brother assured my death, I could see I’d managed to get it completely wrong.
Instead of waking up to see my grandfather waiting for me in the river, there was darkness. So much darkness, and the pain… The pain seared through every inch of my body. Never had I experienced such agony.
And worse than the physical hurt was the fact that my otter was gone. I couldn’t feel him at all.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to run. I wanted to scream. But I couldn’t do any of it. My body refused to move, which made sense considering I was probably dead.
Dead. My brother had won. And knowing him, he was celebrating.
The more I struggled, the more it hurt, and I managed to move not at all, solidifying my theory.
Then, I remembered something I learned in school. Some philosopher somewhere said that death might be going to be with the goddess, but it also could be just having the best night’s sleep ever. I’d never been the best student, and why this stuck with me, I would never know, but I was glad it did. It gave me hope.
Option one obviously didn’t happen, and I decided to force option two. I worked as hard as I could, trying to get back to sleep. Sleep was so much better than this torment.
It must’ve worked, because the next thing I remembered was darkness again. But this time, the pain was less. I still couldn’t find my otter, but I could feel him… maybe. He was still really far away.
Maybe going to the goddess was a journey that required steps and this was one of them.
Sleep. That’s what I was going to do. Over and over again until I finally reached my destination.
And I did exactly that. I’d force sleep using every trick I knew, from counting to reciting otter law in my head over and over again. When I came to again, I just willed myself back to sleeplike I did before. It was the only thing I could physically do, and I held onto it like it was the golden ticket to peace.
I lost track of how many times I went through the cycle, but this time when I woke up, something had changed.
My body wasn’t against anything hard, the ground beneath me now soft… and I was warm. That wasn’t the weirdest part, though. I was covered by something… not dirt like I initially feared. Logic caught up with me, and I realized my face was fine, unlike my body. And if you were getting buried, it was all of you.
I heard something in the background, just a shuffle of feet. Not too close, but not as far as my otter.
No more going back to sleep. I worked hard and cracked my eyes open… slamming them shut instantly. It was so bright it hurt. Maybe I’d made it to the goddess after all and was in the glorious sun along the riverbank near my grandfather.
I cracked my eyes open again. This time I was able to keep them open long enough to catch a glimpse. I wasn’t outside. I was in a room… one I didn’t recognize.
I blinked away the fuzziness.
Where was I?
I inhaled deeply, and it was like all the scents slammed into me at once. So different than by the water, where I couldn’t scent a thing. There was mildew, lots of dust, some meat, and soap. But none of that shocked me as much as the scent coming to the forefront, the scent of lavender and pine. And was it basil? What was I tasting? Scenting?
My otter, who I hadn’t been able to find, lunged forward and gave me the answer I needed.Mate. Our alpha.
