Page 25 of His to Keep
“No?” he murmurs, rubbing his nose along my jaw now, breathing me in. “Why did you leave?”
“Because I was tired of living with someone who wanted to control my life.”
That finally seems to break through to him, and he pulls back to look into my eyes, making me immediately regret the loss of his touch. “A lover?” he growls, anger and jealousy mixing in his tone.
I blink at him. “No. My father.”
He pulls away farther, the jealousy fading but leaving plenty of anger behind. “He controlled you?”
“He was…is…an…important man.”
“And that made him controlling?”
I shrug. “He had certain expectations. For me. About how I was supposed to act. The choices I was supposed to make. He could be incredibly generous.” I swallow. Generous with his money, but never his affection. “So long as I played the game he wanted me to play.”
His eyes search mine. “And you didn’t want to play.”
“I couldn’t.” Playing my father’s game meant giving up everything I ever wanted. A meaningful career, the possibility of finding true love. Of exploring the darker parts of me, those forbidden desires that I had to keep hidden for so long.
“He wanted me to marry one of his colleagues. Thought it would be good for his…reputation.” Good for hiscampaign. But I don’t say that to Luke. For some reason, even with everything I’ve shown him already, I don’t want him to know who my father is. “I wouldn’t have been able to work. I would have been a trophy.” I study his face, wondering if he could possibly understand. A man like Luke has probably never lacked control a day in his life. He would have no idea what it feels like to be at the whims of someone else, to not have a say in your future or life. “Anyhow, my scholarships meant that I didn’t have to rely on him anymore. They meant I could make my own choices, leave home, do what I wanted.” My eyes sting and I order myself not to cry in front of him. “Or at least, they did.”
“Until you had to drop out.”
I nod, avoiding his eyes. “But that’s why I need this job, Luke. I might not be in school, but at least I’m here. If I can’t pay my rent anymore, that means I have to move home. And I promised myself I would never do that.”
He growls lightly, frustrated. “I told you I wouldn’t do anything to make you lose this job.”
I look pointedly at the mere inch of space between us. “You said no complications.”
He runs a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated. “Rebecca—”
“I can’t risk it,” I whisper. “I need this job.”
“You have this job. Even if—”
“I’m sleeping with my boss? Come on, Luke. You know it never works out like that.”
“We’ll move you to a different department.” He winces. “Not back to finance. You can work for someone old. Or a woman.”
I ignore that. “You would still be my boss. You’d be in control of my careerandmy social life. It’s too much. I’d get lost in you.”
“You couldn’t get lost in another person,” he says hotly. “Some women, yes. Not you. You’re too…strong.”
That surprises me. I’m not sure when he thinks he’s seen this so called strength—was it when I was getting him his coffee in the morning or when I was submitting to him at Club Wyld? The thought makes me feel sick.
“That’s why it works, with Aden,” I say, doing my best not to flinch when something like rage crosses his features at the name of my dom. “Because we keep things separate. We have our time at the club and then we go back to our own lives.”
Suddenly, the room spins around me and I realize a second later that I’m flat on my back on the couch, Luke’s strong body pinning me down. “And that’s what you think you want?” he growls in my face. “A man so imbecilic and weak that he would let a woman like you out of his sight?”
It’s too hard to concentrate when I can feel every inch of him pressed against me, when his angry eyes are so close to mine, his breath hot in my face.
“Luke—”
“I would worship you,” he murmurs, voice softening. “You know what I can do to you. You’ve felt it. It wouldn’t make you weak. I would celebrate you and care for you and build you up every day. You know why?”
I shake my head, too far gone to speak. I want every single thing he’s promising me, want them so badly that I think I just might sacrifice anything to get them.
“Because you’re a goddess, Rebecca,” he whispers, bringing his lips to the side of my neck and pressing a single kiss there, just over my pulse point. “You’re a goddess and you deserve a man who sees you that way. Not whatever garbage you get from…him.” He grimaces, like he can’t bear to say Aden’s name, then kisses my neck again, right under my jaw. Then again, on my cheek. Again, closer to my mouth. Whatever will I had to deny him is fast fleeing my body.
