Page 22 of The Enforcer's Revenge
“About pie?”
“About him and your pie.” Carina picked up her phone and handed it to Brianna. “Text him. If I try it right now, I’ll fuck it up, and he’ll be all judgmental after Nova’s shit. Tell him no pie. Since apparently, he tells everyone my shit. I don’t even like pie that much. I’m more of a salty sausage woman.”
“No strawberry pie,” Brianna added as she started texting on Carina’s phone. “So, he understands that you don’t like my pie. You only like highly religious pie and salty sausage.”
“Right? Religious pie is a novelty. Everyone likes it, but no strawberry pie. Only cake. I want weed, too. Weed and pie sound good.”
“I thought pie was bad?” Brianna was still texting. “You told me to tell him it was bad.”
“Right, no pie. Only weed.”
“Did it taste like sacramental bread?” Brianna asked curiously, thinking about Carina and Sister Justina, which would never stop being scandalous.
Carina frowned at her in confusion. “What?”
“The pie,” Brianna clarified.
“She went down on me. I didn’t even eat her sacramental pie, but I guess Tino forgot that part.” Carina pointed at her phone in Brianna’s hand. “Tell him that.”
“I’ll tell him, but I think it’s bullshit,” Brianna whispered, even as she typed the opposite. “I would’ve tasted it. That means you did. You tasted it, Carina.”
Carina was quiet for a moment before she turned and gave Brianna a wide, unapologetic smile. “Yeah, I tasted it.”
“Was it good?”
“Tasted like the bar soap in Nonno’s shower.”
They both burst out laughing, and the conversation just went downhill from there. Brianna wasn’t really sure how much time had passed because, in the name of being a good friend, she had started drinking right when she got home from rehearsal and skipped dinner. She hadn’t had two bowls of ice cream like Carina, so it was all going to her head.
Most of the time, they discussed cake and texted about pie. Brianna was starving now. Fuck rehearsal tomorrow. When the door opened, she shouted, “Did you bring pie?”
“No, I brought cake.” There was a long pause. “And weed.”
“Oh!” Carina jumped up and ran to the front door, then pulled back in horror as she stared at her brother like she forgot until that moment how angry she was at him. It was obvious that reaching out to him when she needed something had just been an instinct, one she got over as she shouted, “I told you not to come over! I hate you!”
“You changed your mind about that. I have about a hundred texts to prove it.” Tino held up his hands, presenting two pieces of cake in plastic containers. “How long has Brianna been sending your texts for you?”
“She doesn’t send my texts for me,” Carina growled at him. “You’re just thinking that because of what Nova said. He’s not always right, you know.”
“Really? ’Cause, uh, you’ve been talking about me eating your pie for at least the last thirty texts. I really hope the government never gets hold of your phone,” Tino said with an arch of hiseyebrow. “Why didn’t you just tell me you have trouble reading, Carina? You obviously told Brianna a long time ago. Don’t think I don’t remember how she would read out loud when we were studying. I get it now, and you know Nova would’ve helped you if you told me. You think I didn’t have issues when I was a kid? He knows all the tricks to make it easier.”
“I can read, motherfucker. Just not fast. Or drunk,” Carina said defensively. Then she walked back and yanked the phone out of Brianna’s hand. She stood there staring at the screen for a while, then she raised her eyebrows. “Porca puttana.” She lifted her head and glared at Brianna. “Your menu. What are you? An all-you-can-eat buffet? What the fuck do you have left for his birthday if you’re just laying it all out on the table?”
“I like your menu, baby,” Tino assured her. “I’ll eat at your buffet any time.”
“And yet, no pie.” Brianna held up her hands as evidence. “Maybe I would like pie. I’m not boring, you know?”
“I never said you were. How ’bout I eat the pie, and you just provide it. Does that work? Since you’re more of a salty sausage person.”
“Strawberry pie,” Brianna added.
“That’s my favorite flavor.” Tino said it like he meant it. “I fucking love your strawberry pie.”
“What is this word?” Carina asked him as she pointed to her phone.
“Sacramental,” Tino said with a smile. “I think that’s the best part.”
“I could do that for your birthday. That’s new,” Brianna said thoughtfully. “I’ll steal the costumes from school. Except, oh my God, baby, your birthday already passed.”
