Page 16 of Caruso
“I told you. Money.”
“What are you running from, Taylor?”
It’s the first time he’s demanded an answer from me with a threat edging his words. He hasn’t said as much, but it’s there in the timbre of his vocal chords. Danger, retribution, anger, it’s heavy in the air, almost choking me and I realize I have nowhere to hide and my past looms up and surrounds me as it always does when I dare to believe it’s in the past.
“My stepfather.” I say simply, hoping that will beenough of an explanation but already accepting the past will be laid bare on this table tonight.
“Why?”
The air stills as that man ruins a perfectly good evening, and I lower my silverware and fix Matteo with a blank expression.
“When my mother died, he told me I would be her replacement. I ran from that privilege.”
“Did he–?” He doesn’t need to finish the sentence to explain his meaning, and I shake my head.
“I told you, I’m a virgin. I have him to thank for that. No, he made it perfectly clear that as soon as I reached eighteen, he would enjoy that perk when he nailed me to his bed—his words, not mine. So, I made certain I wasn’t around to experience his brand of hell, and I ran away.”
“So, you’re eighteen.”
Matteo’s eyes raise into his hairline, and I shake my head. “I’m twenty-two, so you could say I’ve been hungry for four years.”
“Fuck.”
“I told you, I’ve worked my way through most jobs in this town. It’s taken four years to reach the end of the line.”
“But you remained a virgin—why?”
“Because nobody deserved to be my first. Until you.”
His eyes gleam as I lay honesty on the line and add, “The thing is, Matteo, men see a woman and reasoning goes out of the window. At least when they sense she is down on her luck and out of options. The guys I have met here are of a certain type and believe they have the rightto exploit a woman who has nobody to fight in her corner. So, I learned to fight. Not that I needed to sharpen my skills because I have spent the past twelve years learning to defend myself.”
“Which explains what happened downstairs.” Matteo laughs softly. “You fight like an assassin, Taylor. That’s not a skill you can learn on the internet or in any book. Who taught you?”
“Natural ability, I’m guessing.”
“Do you expect me to believe that?”
I close my eyes as I battle against revealing my source, and his warning growl causes me to sigh.
“I had a friend, the only one I’ve had, and I used to follow him around, no matter how much he told me not to.”
Matteo says nothing at all, and the stage is firmly mine, and I allow myself to let the memory slip back into my life, wondering if that will ruin me far more than any guy chancing his luck.
“He was older than me. Tall, full of muscles and a protector. He was also kind and caring and recognized I could use a friend.”
I gloss over the memories and get to the point, without revealing exactly how close we were of mind, not body. I’m not ready for that.
“He used to box in fights set up for money, not honor. He never knew I followed him and slipped into the shadows while I watched him batter men for money. It was–”
I swallow hard, wondering if I should reveal the truehorrors I witnessed, and I close my eyes on the pain and whisper, “a fight to the death.”
The air is still, choking me with memories as I remember the stench of evil that surrounded every spectator in the room. The way they used to pant at the sight of the two men in the makeshift ring. The way the fighters bled, groaned and pleaded for their lives. The way they died horrifically, falling into the dirt at their feet to cheers of delight, not sorrow.
Matteo says gently. “What happened to your friend?”
I shrug, relying on the cool detachment that has guarded my heart since that day.
“One night I was sick. I never made it to the fight, and the next day he was gone. I asked around, desperate for news, and all it earned me was a beating from my stepfather. He thought I was seeing him in an inappropriate way, and as he kicked me hard in the ribs, he taunted me by telling me he had died. He had fought and lost, and the man he lost to was kicking me now. The man who would always control me and become my husband. The man who would own my soul and command me for eternity.”
