Page 81 of Quest for her Knights
“What?” His eyes open and he watches my tears with a look of confusion.
“Why did you even come in here? Can you go away now? I just want to be left alone.” It takes everything I have to hold in my sobbing as I roll away and wait for him to leave. It takes him a few seconds, but he silently gets up and leaves, the door clicking shut behind him.
I hold the pillow tight over my head as I let my sob break free. If he couldn’t kiss me in that moment, then he never will. He might think he wants to be with me, but he must not feel the same pull that I do. I don’t feel like I could ever choose anyone but them. And that thought alone has me crying even harder. Because I can’t have them, I keep telling myself that I finally get it, but this time, with Blaze being so close to kissing me, andeven hidden away from any prying eyes, he couldn’t do it. He chose his duty as a knight over me.
I suppose it’s honorable of them to be holding their ground the way they are, but I hate it. I want them to want me so much that they throw all of that away to be with me. I don’t know why it even matters so much with the kings and queen think. They didn’t seem that bad, I’m sure we could convince them it’s for the best.
But it doesn’t matter. The knights will never cross that line. And as much as I’d like to think of myself as badass enough to slip out the bedroom window here, and make my way to the local town where I’d find some charming men ready to take me home and ravish me, I know I’d probably be attacked by a wild animal or bandit within ten minutes. This is nothing like my world.
My only option is to suck it up, go back out there and try to make things work with these lords. I don’t think there are many left to meet, and going by the past ones I’ve met, Darian and his brothers might be the closest I get to being happy.
Chapter twenty-five
Draven
“What do you mean, you made it worse?” Arrow asks as Blaze sits down heavily on the sofa, looking dejected.
“I thought I was helping for a minute, then, well, it backfired.”
I press my ear to the bedroom door and hear a muffled sob. I turn angry eyes on Blaze. “What did you say to her?”
“Nothing! I mean, I just… she asked me to kiss her.” My eyes widen in surprise. I didn’t expect that.
“Oh, I get it,” Arrow says, taking a seat beside Blaze and patting him on the back in sympathy. “You’re that bad of a kisser, huh?”
“What? No! I didn’t kiss her.”
“Wow, I don’t think I could have denied her,” Arrow says, mirroring my thoughts. Though I’d never admit it, I was far too close to kissing her myself before she stormed off to the bedroom.
Elora wears her emotions on her sleeve, and whether she’s happy or frustrated, I find myself tempted to grab her and kiss the living hell out of her, just for a moment, to know what it’d be like. It’s not just that I’ve never kissed a woman before. It’s that I want to kiss her specifically.
“Well, you need to,” Ranger tells his brother. “She is off-limits. Blaze was right to refuse her.”
“Even if it makes her cry like that?” Arrow asks, gesturing toward the closed bedroom door.
“It’s not our decision. It’s our duty.”
“Even if it makes us miserable?” Arrow asks, looking pained.
“Yes,” Ranger grits out.
“Even if it makes her miserable?” Blaze asks, wearing the same look of despair.
“You’re all acting like I made this choice. Have you lost your minds? You know what it means to be a knight. You all agreed to this mission. Whether she likes it or not—”
“But don’t you care that she doesn’t want this?” Blaze asks, dragging his hands through his hair in frustration. “She doesn’t want to be a princess. She doesn’t want any lords. She wants us.”
My heart thuds heavily in my chest. Is that true? Does she want all of us? I’ve kept my distance this whole trip, but it hasn’t stopped her from worming her way into my heart.
I hear the door creak open and see red-eyed Elora peek out. The others don’t seem to notice.
Ranger’s eyes stay fixed on the other two as he says, “I don’t care what she wants.”
“You don’t mean that,” I say, giving him a chance to walk it back. But he doesn’t catch the tone and nods.
“I do. It’s my job, our job, to protect her. To make sure she acts appropriately. It doesn’t matter how she feels about it. It doesn’t matter how you feel about it. This is our duty. She’s a job. Nothing more.”
Fucking hell. Her face crumples, and I open my mouth to say something, but I come up short. I can’t comfort her. None of us can. She closes her eyes, then the door, slowly.
