Page 33 of A Lovely White Christmastide
“No. If she had, I would have let her know that I have not sung in years and have no intention to do so any time in the future.”
Miss Haynes stared out the window. While she may have stayed by him physically, her thoughts appeared to be far away. What memory was she visiting?
“I know it is none of my affair, but might I inquire why you have refrained from using what others are lauding as a glorious talent?”
She gave him a sideways glance. “Are you always this impertinent?”
He ducked his head, embarrassed that he’d even asked.
“I stopped singing after my intended broke our understanding.”
His head shot up, surprised and honored that she’d chosen to trust him. “You were engaged?”
“No, not exactly. Edward and I grew up together. Everyone expected us to wed one day; I expected it… but apparently he changed his mind. He is happy now, though. The proud father of two sons from what I understand.”
The offhanded way she spoke of her former beau did not deceive him. She stood as still as the statue on the nearby table and pain was etched in the lines of her face.
Carswell lowered his voice. “He is a fool.”
“No, I am… for thinking he actually loved me.” She turned to face him. “But in turn I learned that love is far more than a dream. It is a reality, both beautiful and painful. And while Iwould not want anyone to learn about love as I did, I could never wish the experience away from them.”
Carswell searched her earnest face. Who was this strong woman who, in spite of her pain, still clung to the hope of love?
“Then,” he said, placing a hand on her shoulder, “you should sing.”
She sputtered a laugh. “How did you derive such an interpretation from what I have shared?”
He loved the way her eyes crinkled when she smiled. “Because this Edward, unworthy as he may be, already walked away with your heart. Why give him your voice as well?”
She blinked several times, opening and closing her mouth as if she wished to dispute his words.
“There you are,” Miss Julianna said, taking hold of her sister's arm. A flick of her eyes made Carswell turn. Mr. Caleb Waverly followed not far behind.
He sighed. It seemed his discussion with Miss Haynes would have to wait. He needed to play the role of knight in shining armor yet again.
Chapter Ten
Julianna squeezed Beth’s arm, hoping she understood the message.
“If you will excuse us, Lord Bingham,” Beth said, “My sister and I need to discuss something.”
“By all means. I have been meaning to speak to Mr. Caleb Waverly about his education.”
The annoying gentleman came to a stop in front of them, confusion clouding his face. “You wished to speak with me?”
Julianna did not wait for Lord Bingham’s answer. She rushed her sister away to the retiring room.
“I am full sick of Caleb,” she said the moment they were alone. “It was bad enough that he followed me around when we were children, but he has gone too far. Did you know he tried to corner me in the library today? Thank heavens Mr. Kaye happened to be already seated in one of the chairs near the back. And when I chastised him for his impropriety, he said ‘a meeting between two people as well acquainted as we are could never be deemed inappropriate.’ What is that supposed to mean?”
“Jule, I think you must be prepared for him to offer for you. He is almost at the end of his education and has already beenmaking waves in London with the cases where he has assisted. He even helped on a case for the Duke of Rothes.”
“No. I would never accept him no matter what his connections. How could he think I’d for one moment entertain the idea of a union between us? He is boring and pompous and nothing like the man I wish to marry.”
“And what sort of man do you wish to marry?” Beth’s mouth curved into a mischievous smile that made Julianna pause.
What sort of man did she wish to marry? “Well, to begin with he must be personable. I detest men who dislike Society. He must also be kind with an interest in the things I say, not just an interest in my appearance. A good understanding of humor would be nice, and I would not mind if he had dark hair and a fine build.”
Beth burst into laughter. “You have just described Mr. Kaye, Jule.”
