Page 108 of As They Are
I got a minute of his lips sliding against mine. Of his hand tightening on my hip. In that minute, I thought of all the ways I could push him again.
But then he pulled away.
“What are you doing?” he asked. “There’s no one around.”
“I-I know, I just ...” Words failed me. What was I doing pushing the boundaries of our fake relationship? “Sorry. That was me acting on an impulse.”
“Animpulse?” He seemed so confused, like me kissing him was the last thing he expected.
Shame made my cheeks hot. “I got my wires crossed. I thought maybe we could—we were heading toward doing something more.”
“We’re not,” he immediately said. “Wecan’t.”
Oh,God.I was never allowed to fake date again. I’d now been rejected bybothmen I’d done this with. That feeling—the one I hated—infected every inch of me.
“Of course,” I replied. My voice didn’t shake, but I didn’t sound like myself.
“You’re . . . disappointed?”
“I mean, yeah. But I’ll get over it. You don’t like me that way, and I got confused. Sorry about that.”
I gave him a tight smile. At least I’d gotten an apology out. Hopefully, this wouldn’t ruin things between us too badly. Now I needed to get the hell out of the clinic and process what I’d just done.
But his hand was back on my midsection. “I never said I didn’t like you.”
“You don’t have to say it. I can figure out why you’re saying no.” Even if it hurt like abitch.It was tempting to cry, but I refused to let it happen. At least until I was alone.
“Wren, stop. I’m not saying no because I don’t want you. How could I not want you? You’re ...” He looked at me, gesturing up and down. “You.”
“It’s stopped many people before, trust me.”
“Not me. God, never me. I’ve thought about it since the day wemet.”
My heart jumped at his words. He had? “Then why are you saying no?”
“Doing this changes things between us. We’re supposed to be fake dating for the cameras, and friends in private. That’s already complex enough. Adding more in? It could end terribly. We have rules for a reason.”
“Fuck the rules.”
“That’s not how I operate. You’re saying your wires would get crossed. Mine would too, and then when it’s over, we’re both hurting.”
He was seeing this logically. I knew he was. And deep down, I knew he was right. But Henry’s hand was still on my midsection and that clouded everything else. I wanted him. He wanted me.
So, how could I make this happen?
“We can make it so both of us know this is a one-time thing.”
His brow furrowed. “A one-time thing.”
“Yeah. We’re getting it out of our systems. I don’t know about you, but thinking about this has definitely clouded my judgment a little. We could clear the air.”
He blinked,actuallyconsidering it. “It’s been distracting for me too.”
“Exactly. We do this once. Have fun. And then go back to what we were before. We can even make it a rule.”
“Idolike rules.” He bit his lip. “So, one time?—”
“And we do whatever we want.” I tugged on his tie again.
