Page 9 of Wings of Frost and Fury
“I feed you and care for you so well, yet all you do is judge me.” I give her nose an affectionate pat. “Get some rest. We may have to depart quickly tomorrow.”
I startle out of a wine-drenched sleep. It takes me a moment to reassure myself that the loud sound I’m hearing isn’t thunder; it’s someone pounding on the cottage door.
I gulp from the cup beside my bed, and with the cool flow of the water, my memory returns—the knowledge of what I did to deserve being awakened this early.
“The cock thing,” I mutter. “Of course.”
What seemed like a wonderful idea last night appears much less wise this morning. I should have simply told the young mannoand left it alone. Instead I had to go and infuriate not only him, but probably his influential parents and the rest of his family as well.
“Fuck, Thelise, when will you learn?” I groan, swinging my legs off the bed. I’m naked, since that’s how I prefer to sleep, and I don’t bother getting dressed. When people are well and truly furious, throwing them off their game is often the best course of action. My nudity will be a shock to them, which will give me a few extra moments to assess the situation and determine whether I should threaten or cajole. Usually I do both, but I like to vary the order and the details.
When I answer the knock, I take on my best sultry pose, hip cocked, one arm draped along the doorframe. “How can I help you gentlemen?”
There are three men facing me: the young man from the market, an older man in rich clothing who must be his father, and a third man who, judging by his uniform, appears to be a steward or a valet. The young man is wearing a cloak, and I immediately spot the lump beneath the hood that’s draped over his head. With a monumental effort, I suppress the smirk that wants to curl the corner of my mouth.
All three men look as shocked by my nakedness as I hoped they would be.
“What in the—this is absolutely—we are here to protest the results of your spell,” stammers the father. “That is to say, the indignity to which you have subjected my son. My god, woman, why have you not covered yourself? Don’t you know who I am?”
“Doyouknow whoIam?” I step forward, graceful, predatory, and cup the man’s bearded jaw with my hand. “I am Thelise, daughter of the Supreme Sorcerer. Be careful how you speak to me.”
He swallows, fear sparking in his eyes.
The valet steps forward. He’s in his forties, an earnest, intelligent-looking person. Nice face, creased around the eyes as if he smiles frequently. I like him. “Lady Sorceress, I beg your indulgence on behalf of this young man, whom I have served since he was a child. Whatever foolishness he may have spoken to you—and yes, he can be foolish—he does not deserve to bear this shame.”
“What shame?” I blink innocently.
“Show her, Arnett,” the valet urges the young man.
“I don’t want to.” Arnett hunches deeper into his cloak.
“For god’s sake—” His father tears off the hood.
A long, soft cock has sprouted from the center of the young man’s hairline. It flops over his forehead, thick and flaccid.
It’s all I can do to restrain my laughter. I force myself to assume an expression of utter confusion. “Fuck me! It’s in the wrong place!”
The young man’s father frowns. “Did you not intend to put it there?”
“On my honor, I did not. How curious! Then again, some of my spells have been known to go terribly wrong. I’m so sorry. I thought your son knew the risks. He seemed to have heard of me, so I thought he would know that I’m not very good at magic.”
The father turns to Arnett. “How much did you know about this woman’s skills, or lack thereof?”
The young man has kept his head bent since they arrived, but he’s looking up now—looking at me, in my naked state. His cheeks flush, and as the blood rises to them, it rises to the cock as well. The whole thing stiffens obscenely, like the fleshy horn of a lecherous unicorn.
“I didn’t realize,” he mutters.
“You paid her without asking enough questions. Of course you did. You’re a good-for-nothing spendthrift,” snarls hisfather. Then he glares at me. “As for you, sorceress, you’re no longer welcome in this town.”
He’s within his rights to ask me to leave. I’ve been through this sort of encounter before. Whenever I come to a new area, inevitably I’m recognized by someone and asked to perform magic, especially if it’s been a long time since my last fuck-up. People’s memories are pathetically short. I have to give them a fresh example of my supposed incompetence so they’ll leave me alone until some other circumstance forces me to move on, or until I get bored of the area.
I let my eyes turn tragic and liquid while my lip trembles. With earnest supplication, I look into the father’s eyes. “Please, my lord,” I beg, even though I have no idea what his official rank is. “Please let me stay here. I know I’m not a very good enchantress. I hoped I could achieve a good result for your son, but as usual, my magic failed me.” My lip wobbles more, and tears slip from my eyes. “You can’t imagine how dreadful it is to be so awful at magic, especially when my father excels at it.”
The father clears his throat and glances at the valet. “Well… we can’t have you mucking about with magic in our town.”
“I swear I won’t. No more spells, I promise. And please allow me to accompany your son to market today and purchase several fine hats that will help him cover up that… protuberance.”
“Cover it up?” exclaims Arnett. “No, no, I can’t live with this! You must remove it!”
