Page 103 of A Court of Hearts and Hunger
“I won’t watch the Queen kill you.” Riordan’s voice is a shredded whisper. “And you know it will happen, sooner or later.”
Tears slip from Caer’s eyes. “But you’d let the Queen kill Alice? She belongs to us, Riordan, she’s mine—she’s yours.”
“She belongs to herself.” Riordan leans back, moving his hand from Caer’s throat to his chest. He looks up, meeting my eyes.
Now that they’ve settled down, I venture in, sinking to my knees beside the two of them. “I’m doing this for you,” I murmur, stroking the inky tendrils back from Caer’s sweat-damp brow.
He looks up at me, his violet eyes pooled with sorrow. “I wish you wouldn’t, mouse.”
My heart fractures, and I bend swiftly down to kiss him. His lips are damp, salty with tears. His fingers cup the back of my head, a spastic grip, crushing our mouths together. I kiss him with all the affection in my heart, and I wonder at the strength of it, how it took form and shape so quickly.
A hand settles on my back. Long fingers splayed, a tentative touch. Riordan.
He begins to stroke my back through the robe, and then his hand slides around to cup the curve of my waist as I savor Caer’s lips, slowly now, gentle soothing kisses.
Caer’s long tongue slithers into my mouth, and I realize, with a flush of wanton heat, that I want his tongue on me—in me. I want him inside me.
But Riordan—I can’t forget the way his mouth coaxed me to pleasure again and again. How he kissed me against the wall in the exam room.
I want him inside me too.
How did I come to care for these two wicked beings? I desire them both—the playfulness and comfort of Caer, the passionate intensity of Riordan. That’s wrong, isn’t it? Wanting two men at the same time? Isn’t a woman supposed to choose one?
And I can’t have either of them, because I am a virgin sacrifice to the Queen. She will take my heart, and I will become Heartless—and when she dies, I will perish, too.
Riordan moves. Shifts my hair aside and places a warm kiss on the back of my neck.
All my nerves ignite, desire flooding in waves from that single spot.
I sit up and meet his eyes, my cheeks burning. I don’t dare voice the visions spinning in my head—visions of silky skin and long limbs, of kisses in the soft glow of the orbs overhead, of a Cat’s tail winding around my thigh while I play with a Rabbit’s sensitive long ears. Of a wide, wide grin between my legs as a long purple tongue writhes over my pussy. Of being bent over an examination table while scarred hands brace my hips and a thick, hot shaft plunges deep into my body.
Riordan knows what I’m thinking. I’m sure of it. And when I glance at Caer, he blinks hard and looks away. “The things we could have done, mousie.”
“Caer,” I murmur. “You know why I have to—”
But he recoils and lunges to his feet, wrecked and bloody from his fight with Riordan. “Don’t. You might think you have to sacrifice yourself, but I don’t have to fucking watch it.”
And he races from the room.
A moment later, the heavy front door booms as he slams it shut, with a finality that reverberates through the house.
It’s what he does. He runs away, rather than facing his emotions and confronting reality. Who am I to judge him for it?
Riordan and I stay where we are, sitting on the floor. At last he speaks, his voice so low I can barely hear him.
“I did not want to raise false hope in Caer. Nor do I want to fool you into thinking you might survive this. But if all goes according to plan, and we conquer the Queen—I may be able to save you afterward, if I act quickly. Once she takes your heart, you will transform into one of the Heartless. If I time it just right, there’s a chance.”
“I’ll take it.”
“What I do to save you will be primal, messy—”
“I don’t care. Do it. You have my full consent, in case I’m not in a position to agree in the moment. Do anything you have to do, to save me.” My chin wobbles, and I bite my lip, angry at myself for the weakness. “I’m not crying because I regret doing this,” I choke out. “Only because—because—”
“Because it will hurt, and because you could die. Truthfully, kitten, I’m glad to see the tears.” He sighs, a faint smile playing over his mouth. “I thought you’d lost all sense of self-preservation.”
My sob breaks into a chuckle, and I lean into him, instinctively, as if he’s my comfort instead of my jailer.
He places his arms around me, gingerly at first, and then he relaxes.
