Page 51 of Nobody Wants Me
What good was I to him?
It made no sense, yet look what had happened.I’d somehow ended back up with Volkov, which is where I was supposed to be.
I was preparing the steaks when Victor walked in.I had already heard the helicopter leaving.We were once again alone.
“You okay?”Victor asked.
“Am I okay?To be honest, I don’t know what to think or what to feel right now.It is a lot to take in.”
“The Butcher was the one who figured it out,” Victor said.
“She was?”
He nodded.
“How?”
“You looked familiar to her.She did some digging, went with her gut, and this is what she found out.”
“Wow,” I said.“If she is paid by Ivan, she deserves a raise.Do you want a salad with your steak, or just potatoes?”
“Potatoes,” he said, with a wrinkle of his nose.
“He said he doesn’t think this is going to change much.”I opened up the fridge to grab some of the ingredients to make a fresh salad.
The wine called to me, even though I didn’t drink.Wine tasted a little like vinegar to me, but with what I had just learned, I didn’t think now was the time to hold back.Pulling out the wine bottle, I unscrewed the top and grabbed a glass.The temptation to just swig from the bottle was strong.I poured a very large glass, and then I took a nice long drink.
“Are you thirsty?”Victor asked.
“I just found out that a guy I don’t know is my half-brother.My fake father has made arrangements for me to be killed.He has made my life a nightmare for as long as I can remember, and I’m not even related to him.I just think now is the time to have a drink.”
I took a large gulp.It tasted so bitter.The glass I finished a couple of days ago had given me a lovely hum.I needed that hum.I needed to feel numb.Right now, I didn’t know who I was.
Before Ivan arrived, I was Freya Harris, married to a guy I didn’t choose, and was going to make it work.Now, Ivan has given me the choice to divorce this man.I don’t know why I didn’t just take it.Victor and I were like chalk and cheese.We were not the same, not even close, yet I had a chance to divorce him today and I didn’t take it.Why?
He wanted to kiss me the other day, and I said no.
Drinking my second glass of wine, I finished the entire glass, and that numbness turned into a nice little buzz which I was enjoying.I needed this wine.
Putting the steaks on the grill, the potatoes were nearly cooked, and I attempted to chop a salad.But when you’re not used to drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, your hand coordination goes out the window fast.I put salad ingredients on my plate, however, I was not going to be winning any awards for my chopping anytime soon.
I stumbled as I drained the potatoes, and added way too much butter and salt to the pan.I added a scant amount of pepper.I pretty much just slapped the steaks onto the plate.
Victor grabbed our plates, and I made sure to hold onto my wine.I was not going to let this out of my sight quite so quickly.Stumbling to my chair, Victor helped me sit my ass onto the seat, and then he put the knife and fork into my hand.When he went to take my wine away, I let out a little growl and took the glass from him.
“You’re not taking my wine.”That is what I meant to say, but I’m not exactly sure what came out of my mouth.I was drunk.No doubt about it.
The food was good, and I did miss my mouth a few times.A piece of potato ended up on my chin, and I think I swiped some slices of steak across my cheek.It was not a good look for me.None of this was good.
By the end of the meal, I had no choice but to wipe my face, and then I got to my feet.I might have been onto my fourth or fifth glass of wine.I stopped counting.Who needed to keep counting the wine?
I stumbled and Victor was there to catch me.
“My savior,” I said, and giggled.
Looking up at him, I was struck by how handsome he was.It was odd.I didn’t want to kiss him the other night, but right now I did.Gripping the back of his head, I pulled myself up and smashed our lips together.It was the first kiss I had ever initiated and I wasn’t exactly sure what I was doing.
However, very quickly, everything went completely dark.
